Withering
by Ceretis Paribus
Summary: Isshin visits his old friend and finds that not everything is OK. Isshin is being Isshin. Ryuuken is being self destructive. Uryuu, Ichigo are in there as well.
1. Chapter 1

**Withering – Chapter 1**

Isshin hadn't seen Ryuuken for a couple of months. The battle for Soul Society had seemingly ended with Aizen being captured and sentenced to practically an eternity in immobile darkness.

It was a strange feeling. Peace seemed like such a fickle thing. Restlessness infiltrated every level involved from the captains to some of the children of Kagura Town.

The now powerless Ichigoand Uryuu had gone back to school along side Chad and Orihime.

The work at the clinic had been slow for a couple of days and Isshin was feeling useless. Letting the restlessness getting the better of him he closed the clinic early and before he knew it, he found himself outside Kagura Hospital. It's facade was as gray as his world seemed to be.

The hospital was running as smoothly as ever and everyone was doing their jobs perfectly choreographed like a dance of busy bees.

It was miles away from his job in his modest clinic and he couldn't help but admire Ryuuken.

And pity him a bit.

The man was working his life away.

Coincidentally he ran into the said director on the top floor where he was speaking heatedly to a couple of suit clad men that didn't look too thrilled either.

Ryuuken caught eye of him and swiftly ended the conversation and walked away in the opposite direction towards his own office.

"Ah come on Ishida.," Isshin roared, earning him quite a few stares, "-can't we talk like grown men, eh?"

Ryuuken continued into his office and closed the door behind him seemingly completely unaffected.

Isshin wasn't going to give up discreetly and was quite surprised to find the door unlocked. He had half expected it to be barred and everything.

Ryuuken had found his seat in his chair behind the impressive desk and was lighting a cigarette, inhaling desperately with a annoyed look on his face.

"What? You can't say hello to an old friend anymore?" Isshin began.

"You're hardly any friend of mine, shinigami." Ryuuken commented dryly, inhaling the toxic smoke again. He feigned interest in the papers lying in front of him.

"Knowing you like I think I do, I'm probably your only one," Isshin replied in a tone that could be mistaken for seriousness. The comment earned him a look from Ryuuken.

"Was the anything in particular you wanted to annoy me with or are you just bored?"

Isshin looked more closely at the director. He looked absolutely exhausted with shadows underneath his eyes and he was pale. And now that he was really looking he could see that Ryuuken had lost weight and the man couldn't exactly afford to lose a whole lot as he was quite thin to begin with.

What was much more disturbing was that the man, just sitting there, smoking, seemed to be almost panting. Ryuuken was positively breathless.

"Isshin? What do you want?" Ryuuken interrupted his observations.

"Ryuuken, are you feeling alright?" Isshin asked in a tone quite unfamiliar to Ryuuken. It was enough to get Ryuuken to stop his paper pushing activities and looking at Isshin.

"Why?"

"You're out of breath."

Ryuuken looked uncomfortable and moved his gaze back to the papers.

"Yes, I was shouting at those two gentlemen you saw earlier for quite some time," Ryuuken tried to explain. Clearly not convincing Isshin he cleared his throat, which revealed a nasty rasp from deep within his chest, "- and I've been fighting off a slight chest cold lately," he admitted.

Isshin did not like the sound of the slight cough at all.

"You know there's nothing like a slight chest cold." Isshin scolded. "How long have you been coughing?" Isshin picked up the stethoscope that lay on the desk, undoubtedly Ryuuken's own.

Ryuuken put a dismissive hand in the air between them.

"I'm handling it. It's nothing for you to worry about."

"Yeah, you're handling it. You're looking like a scarecrow."

"I'm sure you didn't come here just to fuzz, Kurosaki," Ryuuken said in a hard tone, finally losing patience.

"When was the last time you measured your blood pressure?" Isshin continued, "A man in your age should measure it regularly."

"A man in my age?" Ryuuken asked tiredly massaging his temples.

"Hey, you're not getting any younger!"

"Kurosaki, I don't have time for this. I have a meeting in," He looked at his wrist watch, "- 10 minutes." He sighed and looked utterly disheartened by that fact.

"Come on Ryuuken. Let me listen to your chest and hear what we're dealing with here."

Ryuuken rose and put out the cigarette.

"You'll just have to trust my judgment. Besides, who made you my caretaker?"

"Figured I had to be, as your only friend."

"Who's looking out for you then?"Ryuuken asked, hoping to get in another comment about how he wouldn't be that person.

"I have my children." Isshin answered neutrally.

The comment was innocent enough, but it hit home. Ryuuken felt it as a very real jolt of pain through his heart.

Uryuu.

Within a second he was composed again and judging by Isshin's appearance he hadn't seen a thing. He gathered the necessary paper work and began making his way to the meeting room one floor below, leaving Isshin to himself at the office.

Isshin knew it was wrong to stay behind, but he was concerned. His old friend didn't look well at all.

So he ceased to opportunity go through his friend's drawers. He tried to do it without leaving too much evidence behind. He found his migraine pills, aspirins, a bucket load of cigarettes, a half empty bottle of scotch, and a bottle of antibiotics. "2 pills twice a day, 3 weeks," Isshin read a loud. Sounded like a little more than a slight chest cold. I sounded more like he'd been fighting off a bout of pneumonia.

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	2. Chapter 2

Withering – Chapter 2

Ryuuken made it through the meeting without further complications, and the next, and the next one. Like everyday he kept going until after dark. Until after most of the administration staff had gone home. He then covered a 12 hour shift for a sick colleague in the ER.

He didn't get home until after noon the next day. Throwing his jacket in the hallway, he made his way to the bright kitchen, where he poured himself a large scotch and lighted a cigarette. He inhaled deeply as he sat down heavily on the uncomfortable kitchen chair. He was tired beyond belief.

Just bone tired.

Too tired to think.

The way he preferred it.

He gulped down the scotch in one go, relishing in the bitter after taste. Bringing the cigarette to his lips and inhaling deeply he was cut short by a nasty rasping cough. The sound of it testified to the fact that his lungs still were under a lot of strain from the pneumonia. It had been a bad bout.

Reluctantly he put out the cigarette and made his way to bed. He just stripped down, tossing the clothes on the floor. One of the perks of having a maid..

An urgent sense of choking woke Ryuuken up. Panic struck as he sat up with a start and immediately began coughing. The damn spasm was rattling his frame through the core.

On shaky legs he found the bathroom and kept coughing over sink, which was quickly stained by the thick plegm that had build up over the short while he'd slept.

He had only just regained his breath when his phone rang.

"Ishida," He answered and winced at the sound of his voice. When had that begun to sound so rough?

"I'm sorry to call you, Ishida-sama. I told them you were sleeping."

"I was up anyway," He pulled the phone away and coughed a couple of times, "-What is it?"

"We have 2 people in cardio and 1 in the ER down with the stomach flu. I have called everyone else, but Aguko-san and Hakura-san are on holliday and Hyuu is sick too." His secretary was sounding truly desperate.

Ryuuken fumbled after a cigarette in his shirt on the floor with hands shaking with the need of nicotine.

"I'll be right in." He answered and hung up. Bringing the cigarette to his lips and lighting it marked the beginning of a new day 6 o'clock in the evening.

He took a quick shower and put on a fresh crisp suit.

Just keep going.

Keep it up.

The next morning Kurosaki Isshin woke up late and relished in the fact that he could back to sleep if he wanted. It was Saturday.

In stead he walked out into the kitchen only to find it occupied by 4 teenagers where only one of them where his own.

"Ohayo Kurosaki sama," squeeled Orihime, "- I've made pan cakes."

"Ohayo," Isshin mumbled. It was still far too early to harass them – he would come back with a vengenge. For now he settled for Orihime's pan cakes.

He wasn't too impressed with Orihime's skills in a kitchen, but admitted to himself that they were better than he'd expected.

"Are there any news from Soul Sociey, Kurosaki-sama?" Uryuu suddenly asked and for a second Isshin could have sworn he heard Ryuuken's voice.

"It too early to talk serious," Isshin moaned and yawned to emphasize, "-so what are 4 healthy young people like yourselves up to today?"

"We were thinking about going over to Kisuke's place later to see if he'd got any news," Chad informed him and shrugged without much enthusiasm. Isshin face quickly formed to one of annoyance..

"You're telling me that you are going to use a perfectly good Saturday to seek out information about war?"

Ichigo nodded.

And Isshin smacked him right across the face.

"THAT IS JUST WRONG!" He bellowed.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" Ichigo howled.

"You should be out playing soccer or see a movie..." Isshin's face where turning bight red "- or something."

He contained himself a bit.

"You shouldn't waste your youth worrying about the wars of Soul Society. You should be out having fun."

Uryuu's gaze suddenly went hard. It took a second for Isshin to figure out why.

That statement was remarkably close to Ryuuken's way of thinking. He wouldn't exactly have phrased that way though. More like "Care for the living instead".

"So you haven't heard any news then?" Uryuu asked again. Isshin let himself fall back into to the chair again.

"God, you're so much more like your farther than anyone of you care to admit. Mr. All business!"

That earned him some stares.

"You know Uryuu's father?" Ichigo ventured.

"Yeah, we're old friends," Isshin answered, looking down into his coffee cup, "-or something like that."

Uryuu said nothing and his lips where even more tight than usual.

"Anyways, there was something going on to the east, but it turned out to be nothing more than an unorganized half hearted rebellion." Isshin explained, sensing that the kids wouldn't find rest until he told them.

"Nothing more than that?" Ichigo asked disbelievingly.

"Nothing more" Isshin confirmed, "It's very quiet."


	3. Chapter 3

**Withering – Chapter 3**

Rather short I'm afraid... sorry

After midday Isshin went back to Kagura Hospital just to let Ryuuken know that he was still alive and that he wouldn't be dismissed quite so easily.

He half hoped to find that the director wouldn't be there. Hopefully he was home resting. Isshin knew that was a stretch, but he could only hope that the doctor in Ryuuken would knock some sense to him someday.

Alas when asking the secretary if he was in, she confirmed.

"He's asked not to be disturbed," she informed him quietly. Isshin put on his most charming face.

"Look, I'm really concerned about him. I'm an old friend. I just want to check up on him."

The poor girl looked torn.

"He has been ailing lately," she argued herself, "go ahead."

"Thanks"

Opening the door to the office as quietly as he could he found the director still asleep on the couch to the right. He looked so innocent in sleep with his face relaxed and without the glasses.

The shirt was looking several sizes to big for Ryuuken as he lay here. Isshin could better tell how much weight his friend had lost now that he hadn't got the jacket on. The sight was disturbing. His old friend was practically just skin and bones.

As he got closer the horrible sound that Ryuuken's breath was making became more and more apparent. It was crackling loudly.

And he was pale. So very pale.

Unable to continue restraining himself, he placed his palm on Ryuuken's forehead.

Ryuuken made a start and before Isshin knew it, Ryuuken, who was now standing, had managed to grab Isshin's arm and had turned it around funnily, forcing him to his knees facing away from the director. Isshin yelped in pain and was a little surprised at the aggressive move Ryuuken had just played.

Ryuuken let go of his arm again,

"Kurosaki?" he croaked out, but then let himself almost fall down into the couch again, his hand holding his forehead.

"Whoa, are you alright?" Isshin asked, picking himself off the floor and touched the director gently on the shoulder.

"Fine," Ryuuken answered and coughed a couple of times, "-just got up too quickly."

Ryuuken noticed Kurosaki's examining look.

"What?"

"You should go home, you don't look too well," Isshin told him with honesty in his voice.

"I can't," Ryuuken sighed heavily and found his glasses in his breast pocket, "-the hospital is hosting a fund raiser party tonight and I'm expected to be there."

"On a Saturday evening?"

"That's why I get the pay I get. When I'm needed or expected I have to be there no matter the time," he replied tiredly as he slowly got up to a standing position.

"I'm sure the director is excused when he can hardly stand up."

"Ah, shut up Kurosaki. I'm perfectly capable of standing," he cleared his throat, "-you just startled me before." Ryuuken put on his glasses and noticed how badly his hands were shaking. On cue he started fumbling for his cigarettes before remembering that they were in jacket he had left on the desk.

Putting one between his lips and lighting it by now a completely fluent movement. He inhaled as deeply as he could without triggering a cough.

"Yeah, you're not addicted..." Kurosaki commented dryly. Ryuuken gave him a look and leaned heavily on the desk. Everything about him as he stood there screamed exhaustion.

"You are looking for an argument," Ryuuken concluded, "-I know I'm addicted to the nicotine, I'm not a fool. I seriously don't have the time for this now. There's a lot of things I need to see to before this fund raiser tonight and they will not solve themselves," Ryuuken almost scolded him, "-now, if you'll excuse me, I'll get to it."

Isshin knew at this point that arguments would be futile.

"I hope that you know what you're doing, Ishida," Isshin replied and began making for the door.

"I'll rest tomorrow," Ryuuken said in a different tone and that earned him a small smile from Isshin.


	4. Chapter 4

Withering – Chapter 4

Kurosaki arrived Monday at the clinic to the news that the Kagura Hospital's director had collapsed at a fund raiser party Saturday night.

Isshin left as soon as he heard and he was so naïve as to think that the director would be at home to rest, but regrettably when arrived at the Ishida estate he was met by the house keeper whom informed him that the director was at the hospital.

Driving to the hospital, Isshin wondered how he could be so stupid as to assume that Ryuuken would ever act logically in such matters. It seemed almost as if the man was scared of taking a day off and spend some time alone.

Ryuuken was in his office and much to Isshin's surprise, he wasn't alone. It clearly wasn't someone that Ryuuken was comfortable with. It was another doctor hiding behind a white coat and just as anonymous as the rest.

Isshin used a couple of seconds to size the other director up; he was looking even paler and his face even more sunken in, if it was possible.

"Kurosaki, what the hell are you doing here?" Ryuuken barked with a cough rough voice.

"I heard you took a tumble," Isshin began but his gaze again turned to the figure sitting in the couch to the right.

"I'm being baby sat," Ryuuken answered his voiceless inquiry, "- the board doesn't appreciate an ailling director and the negative publicity that courses." His tone was bitter and hard and he was clearly holding a grudge against the nameless doctor that watched over him.

"Well, it does come off as though you can't take of yourself," Isshin argued, "-and if you can't take care off yourself, how can you take care of others?"

Ryuuken gave him a long hard stare.

"Well, that would be the thinking behind the project," Isshin tried to reason.

Ryuuken said nothing. Instead he lapsed into a rasping coughing fit which clearly was very painful as his free right hand flew to his ribs.

Isshin furrowed his brow with concern and went around the desk while listening intently to his friend's coughing. Making the most of Ryuuken's lack of attention towards him, he grabbed the stethoscope. Ryuuken was still helplessly trying to get his breathing under control, but his lungs insisted on spasming.

Isshin pulled the office chair Ryuuken was sitting out and turned it so that he was facing him. He knelt down beside the director and put the stethoscope to his chest listened with great care as Ryuuken slowly managed to stop coughing. However, his breathing had a wet wheeze to it now and without meeting Isshin's eyes he let him continue his examination.

Isshin's face didn't chance at all while he continuously moved the stethoscope around on Ryuuken's chest. He ended his examination with running his thumb over the director's ribs, who jumped at the harsh touch.

"How much weight have you lost?" Isshin stood up and again and let himself lean against the massive desk. Ryuuken was hesitant and looking past Isshin on the nameless doctor on the couch.

"You may leave now," Ryuuken bid harshly.

"That would be against my orders, Director," he argued.

"You can see I'm in perfectly good hands. If you insist on sticking around, you may do so outside the door."

The nameless doctor had already run out of good arguments and quickly bowed and left.

There was a couple of seconds of silence between the two remaining doctors, punctuated only by the wet wheeze that made up Ryuuken's breath.

"I think I've lost about 30 pounds," Ryuuken finally admitted.

"Over the last year?"

"Over the last 3 months."

Isshin pursed his lips.

"You know as well as I do how alarming that sounds, Ryuuken. Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you think you've lost so much weight. You apparently don't think it relevant."

"I have been quite busy the last 3 months and I'm afraid that meal times are one of the first things that gets down prioritized... and the bout of pneumonia didn't help either."

"How's your appetite?" Isshin asked, determined to keep Ryuuken from leaving vital information out.

"It's alright," Ryuuken said dismissively, but Isshin immediately picked up in the fact that Ryuuken was avoiding his gaze and started fumbling for his cigarettes.

"When's the last time you ate?"

"Last night," Ryuuken answered, "-I'm not much of a breakfast person," he added while putting the cigarette to his lips.

"And you're not hungry now?"

"Not particularly," The director replied without looking Isshin in eye, lighting his cigarette and inhaling superficially.

"You should really quit smoking."

"Oh, that's new one. Enlighten me," Ryuuken chuckled with a slight smirk on his lips.

"It may be what's interfering with your appetite. If it's not, there might be something more nasty at work. And you know as well as I do, it's the cigarettes that are keeping you from getting over this pneumonia thing."

Ryuuken just nodded and coughed a couple of times behind a closed mouth.'

"I'm sure that you've considered the possibility of this being cancer," Isshin added, expecting a strong reaction from Ryuuken if he brought this up. Much to his surprise Ryuuken didn't flinch at all.

"I have," Ryuuken answered truthfully.

"And...?"

"And I've been x-rayed and I have done all the blood work and it's not cancer."

"When did you get the x-ray?"  
"A month ago."

Isshin took in the information. Clearly Ryuuken had some idea of how bad his condition was if he had considered cancer.

"Would you mind we took one more today?" Isshin asked.

"X-ray? Why?" the Director asked in a hard tone.

"Your lungs sound really bad. How consistent have you been both with the first and second course of antibiotics?"

Isshin had never seen Ryuuken look like he did when he asked that question. He looked like a child caught with his hands in the cookie jar. He looked embarrassed.

"I know I should know better than to be sloppy with the antibiotics course, but I just sort of lost track of time and with my meal times being so irregular I've not kept to them," Ryuuken explained while fiddling with the cigarette and finally putting it out. Isshin would like to have laughed at him, but the thing was that this was a serious matter.

"You shouldn't be in a hospital at all," Isshin looked hard at Ryuuken, "-There are so many weakened sick people here that will succumb to a bout of pneumonia."

"I know, that' partly why they've confined me to my office."

"Can we go and take that x-ray now?" Isshin asked

"I suppose..." Ryuuken replied detached. "-you know, they have cleared out my schedule completely."

Isshin eyed Ryuuken suspiciously.

"Then why are you here? Why are you not at home resting? You're really sick and you should take it easy," Isshin's tone softened "-you're pushing yourself to an early grave."

For once Ryuuken didn't know what to answer; what to do. He didn't like this attention he had drawn to himself. He didn't know how to handle it.

He was tired beyond belief.

He looked at his watch. "I suppose I have time for an x-ray before my board meeting."

"You have a board meeting today?"

"Yes, they called in the whole board just for me today." Ryuuken's voice was thick bitterness.

Thanks to the digitalization of x-rays the image came in seconds after it had been taken. Ryuuken was still buttoning his shirt as he walk up next to the radiologist and Isshin that was plastered to the screen.

"No wonder you can't breathe," Isshin broke the silence. Ryuken said nothing. He just stared at the cobweb that seemed to fill his lungs on the x-ray. Bright white in complicated patterns.

They let the professional study the picture thoroughly. There was no signs of cancer, but there overshadowing signs of infection and signs of damage to the lungs from years and years of heavy smoking.

No surprises there.

Ryuuken left without saying anything. Isshin thought he saw a look of sadness on Ryuuken's face just before he turned around.


	5. Chapter 5

Withering – Chapter 5

Isshin wasn't quite himself the rest of the day. It would have been impossible for an ordinary human to be even standing in Ryuuken's condition. He should have been racked by a high fever.

He should have been bedridden.

The kids ate at his place that evening and then went out to patrol the city. They were so restless the young ones. They were so eager and determined – they all had an uncanny ability to block everything else out but the war.

Kinda like Ryuuken worked his life away in the Hospital.

He hadn't sensed the director's reiastu before he knocked on the front door.

"Ishida? What...?" Isshin stopped. Ryuuken wore an expression that he couldn't recognize or even place. He was restless, fingers fiddling with his sleeves and his brow furrowed. Yet Isshin determined that the other doctor wasn't nervous. However he did look a bit like a drug addict going through withdrawal .

"You quit smoking?" Isshin asked and then realized that it had only been hours since he had seen him last. Withdrawal wouldn't kick that fast.

Ryuuken just shook his head a bit. Isshin then realized that looked Ryuuken a bit as though he was in shock; he was ghastly pale and his face was coated by a sheen of sweat. Futhermore there was a faint shake to his movements. This could all be because that he was ill, but it could also be a sign of that something had happened.

Isshin shot a glance at the road behind him to see if he could see the director's car. There was none to be seen.

"Where's your car? Are you alright? Isshin flew forward and lifted the director's hair out of his face to see if there were any hidden wounds to his head. Ryuuken was sluggish and didn't fight off Isshin's hands.

"No, I took a cab," Ryuuken answered, "-I didn't feel well enough to drive this morning." Isshin withdrew his hands.

"Then what?" Isshin asked desperately. Something was clearly off.

"I quit my job."

Ryuuken's face was completely blank, but Isshin understood the gravity of the fact. A man who lived and breathed his job had just quit. This man standing before him had just lost his purpose in life.

This man had lost his purpose in life numerous times; When his family was the only Quincies left, when his wife died, and when his son left. He had started over as many times.

This time it looked like he didn't have one more in him.

"Come on in," Isshin breathed with a mild face. "-I'll get us a drink. I have some nice scotch that even you might like"

"Make it a double," the other man said dryly. Isshin laughed loud.

"I'll make it a triple if you sit down," he replied and went straight to the cupboard with the liquor and began to pour to glasses.

Ryuuken let himself drop heavily unto the couch and when he took the over sized glass of scotch from Isshin he looked a bit more alert.

As Isshin sat down in the arm chair he couldn't help but notice that Ryuuken's face was slightly flushed as well, indicating that he indeed now was running a fever. He tried to remember whether or not he felt it when he was looking for wounds.

"So I take it that the board meeting wasn't a success" Isshin began. Ryuuken smirked and tried to hide it by taking a sip of the scotch.

"No," He cleared his throat, "-it was not. Their conditions were ridiculous. So now they can try a while without me.

"But surely you can't walk out of a contract just like that," Isshin argued.

"No, but I have so much holiday saved that I can stay away for 3 years," Ryuuken stopped to cough hard 3 time in a row and then gulped down a third of the scotch, "-so they were interested in settling... I'm completely free of the contract."

Isshin processed the news for a bit and contemplated how to best approach the next subject.

"It might be a good thing though," Isshin started gently and then decided that it might be the best thing to just leap into it, "- You have been working way to hard and leading an unhealthy lifestyle. This might be the chance to turn it around. Look on the bright side – it's not as though you have to work. If I know you like I think I know you, you've probably got enough saved to support yourself for 3 lifetimes."

Ryuuken went back to the blank expression and shrugged his shoulders.

"But what will I do. I need something to get up to in the morning," Ryuuken answered subdued before lapsing into one of those coughing fits that practically stole his breath away. With a badly shaking hand he placed the glass on the coffee table without spilling and produced a handkerchief that he coughed wetly into.

"First you need to focus on getting your health back together. Then you start worrying about what you might do," Isshin said, "-what were kind of antibiotics have you been on so far?"

Ryuuken mumbled two words only understandable to other doctors in between coughs. Isshin nodded, took another swig of the scotch and went out into his clinic. He came back a couple of minutes later where Ryuuken had gotten his coughing under control again with a syringe and a slip of paper.

"I obviously don't have the pills in my clinic, but tonight you'll have to do with a shot and tomorrow you'll go to the pharmacy. Since you probably caught in the hospital there's a chance it's one of them nasty strains so I've put you on a combo," Isshin explained out of habit. Ryuuken let him and began unbuttoning his shirt, knowing the drill all too well from all perspectives. He bared his left shoulder and thereby also revealed a painfully visible collar bone and bones in the shoulder that you normally don't see.

"Jeez, you need to put on weight," Isshin said as he stared and probed at the shoulder. Ryuuken shot him a look he knew all too well – he was on thin ice.

"Just administer the shot," Ryuuken bad.

"Yeah yeah, I mean, have you even looked yourself in the mirror? You can't even draw a bow in this condition much less repeatedly."

"Fortunately I don't have to," Ryuuken bit bitterly and made a face as the contents of the syringe was emptied under his skin. Isshin hated this side to Ryuuken.

"You don't have to 'cause our sons are out doing it for us," Isshin said in a uncharacteristically hard tone, "-you're such a hypocrite."

Ryuuken said nothing, he was not at all up for this discussion. Once he had buttoned his shirt again he downed the remainders of the scotch

"Well, you've got your powers back, haven't you?" Ryuuken began emotionless, making Isshin face him again, "-I don't see you out there hunting down hollows."

Isshin put on a grin. "-I know, I just wanted you to acknowledge that it is partly because of Uryuu that you don't have to draw a bow any more."

Ryuuken shook his head tiredly.

"No, it's partly because of Uryuu that Soul Society can sit on their asses and do nothing," he coughed a couple of times, "- It has never been his job or mine for that matter."

"Soul Society can't be everywhere all the time."

Ryuuken shot Isshin a sly look.

"Did you just admit that Soul Society isn't almighty?" Isshin immediately stood up.

"Never," he roared and gulped the rest of his scotch as well and ceremoniously slammed the glass unto the coffee table

"Now, when was the last time you ate?" Isshin asked out of the blue. Ryuuken smirked – apparently the subject wasn't funny anymore.

"It's been a while," he admitted.

"You haven't eaten today at all, have you?"

"No, the board meeting didn't exactly allow me to relax and it lasted longer than I had expected because... then I quit my job and had to have a rather serious conversation with the head of the board, discussing my contract."

"Yare yare, I'll see what I can do. I'm sure I can make some sort of sandwich."

When he returned with sandwiches and all, Ryuuken had fallen asleep. He had only been away for 5 minutes.


	6. Chapter 6

**Withering 6**

Isshin awoke to harsh sound of coughing. It wasn't a pleasant sound.

Ryuuken was sitting up now, almost completely curled up from the force of the spasms. The cough itself was a wet hollow thing that filled the room, making it small and uncomfortable.

Isshin sat up himself. His back popped several times on the way. He hadn't planned on falling asleep in the living room, and especially not on the small couch. He must have been more tired than he thought.

Coming more and more to his senses he registered that it was still dark outside.

He sensed Ryuuken getting up and making his was through the darkness, hand covering his mouth as he clearly looked for a sink.

"Second door on the right," Isshin mumbled with a hoarse sleep voice.

The sound of coughing continued relentlessly now with an added gurgling noise. Ryuuken turned on the water.

Isshin noted that Ryuuken was starting to wheeze in between the coughs, choking upon intake of breath.

"Take it easy out there," Isshin called out, with slight concern in his tone, "-I don't want you fainting out there."

Ryuuken didn't answer – he just kept coughing.

Isshin couldn't imagine waking up to that every morning. He was finding himself more and more glad that he quit smoking years ago.

Ryuuken's body sounded like it was starting to break under the strain.

Ryuuken's cough started to abate. As the cough disappeared it became clear that he was badly out of breath.

"You ok?," Isshin asked out into the silence, only punctuated by Ryuukens wheezing.

"Fine," came a rather pained croak from the bathroom. He came into the living room again without turning the lights on.

"I should go home," Ryuuken began clearly embarrassed that he had fallen asleep on the couch.

"Nonsense, sleep until morning. Remember you don't even have you car parked out front. Do you want to walk home?" Isshin rationalized tiredly and trying to hide a yawn.

"I'll walk," Ryuuken said and started searching his pockets – clearly looking for his cigarettes, "- it's not that far, 30 minutes maybe."

"It's 3 o'clock in the morning, Ryuuken," Isshin argued tiredly, "lie down and wait for morning."

Isshin knew he could offer him a ride, but he was not getting up in the middle of the night for that.

Ryuuken was apparently not letting it go picking up his jacket and headed for the front door. Isshin got up from the couch.

"Ryuuken you're feverish and you're are wearing a very light jacket. Do you really want to walk for an hour in the chilled morning air?"

"It's not that cold this time of year," Ryuuken argued and put on his jacket, flipping the collar up to protect his throat more.

"You could faint if you have that sort of coughing fit you just had," Isshin was growing rapidly bored with this, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Pass out," Ryuuken replied without looking at him.

"What?" Isshin wasn't quite following him.

"Pass out," Ryuuken repeated. Isshin shook his head in disbelief.

"Grown men faint as well, you know."

"Pass out." Ryuuken said again in the exact same tone of voice.

"Whatever, you shouldn't walk home," Isshin managed to put a hand to Ryuuken's forehead before he had a chance to react, "- the fever isn't too bad. You shouldn't be delirious."

"I'm not," Ryuuken replied rather like a child would, "I.. I just don't like imposing on your hospitality. I'm sorry for falling asleep."

"Don't worry about it," Isshin said and disarmingly waved a hand at him, "-get back on that couch and impose some more."

"No thank you," he answered. Isshin thought for a second he saw a hint of a smirk, "-I'm not tired and I would like to get home. Thank you for your help."

With that he disappeared out the door and left Isshin rather convinced that he would make it home alright.

The first intake of the crisp cool morning air immediately brought on a coughing fit. A change in temperature usually did that. The sound ricocheted of the wall of the buildings that surrounded him and magnified it. It made it even worse that the night was a silent.

The spasms soon evaporated and he found himself searching his pocket again for the cigarettes. He knew he shouldn't, but he craved one badly and his shaking hands only underlined that even further. It had been quite a while since he had had a dose of nicotine and his hand shook so badly that he was having a really hard time lighting the cigarette.

He thought he was doing a pretty good job because he so far had managed to cut his smoking down from 40 to 20 a day.

Inhaling deeply from the cigarette brought on almost immediate satisfaction. Except for his chest which instantaneously tried to repel the toxic smoke. He forced the spasms down and inhaled again, spiting his body into submission.

It didn't take long before he reached the middle of town where the streets were alive with young people partying in spite of it being a Monday night. Here where the clubs played loud music and people yelled and laughed he could cough without it being noticed. No one would mind him at all.

The next stretch was through the park. The trail was dimly lit and otherwise it was dark. An alien noise suddenly broke through the silence.

His stomach growled. Ryuuken put his hand on his midsection, only to feel protruding ribs. He had completely forgotten about eating. He sighed - he would have to take the unhealthy option again.

He produced another cigarette, lit it, and inhaled deeply. He knew all to well how good it lessened hunger pains. He was just about to put it to his lips again when he realized that there was a person behind him. Persons even.

Turning around he found 3 young men. They were clearly up to no good. One was acting nervous and refused to look Ryuuken in the eyes. The other two were sporting smirks indicating that they thought that the had already won the battle.

They weren't drug addicts, just young boys with nothing better to do.

"Isn't it passed your bedtimes?" Ryuuken ventured and took a drag off the cigarette. He positioned himself and found his balance.

"Old man, shouldn't you have had your diaper changed hours ago?" The shortest of them countered and he was clearly the leader of the three. The tallest one immediately laughed loudly

"Good one," he snickered. The nervous one said nothing and stayed in the back ground.

Ryuuken didn't know what they wanted; perhaps they just wanted his wallet, perhaps they just need someone to beat up.

One thing was certain – he wasn't going to let them try anything.

When the shortest one made his first move towards Ryuuken, he charged his fist with spirit particles and caught the young man squarely in the jaw.

The bully tumbled backwards several meters.

What happened next didn't register too well as a wave of pain shot across his chest. The bullies made a lot of noise, called him a lot of nasty thing, but retreated.

When the pain didn't ease right away he knew it had been a mistake to manipulate the spirit particles. It was basic quincy knowledge that it could be deadly to try manipulating spirit particles if one's body was somehow weakened.

Succumbing to the urge to cough didn't help the tightness in his chest.

His blood turned cold in his veins.

A hollow was coming up behind him. How could he not have noticed that? Had he really been that careless?

"Shit," Ryuuken muttered and considered running for a second. He knew he wouldn't get far with the pneumonia and empty stomach. He would have a ridiculously hard time manipulating again... not to speak of the pain afterwards.

The hollow must have been attracted to the spirit particle he had collected in his fist just a minute before. This was slightly strange as hollow activity had been really quite limited after Aizen had been imprisoned.

"Damn it," he spat and braced himself. The hollow would appear within second, it's reiatsu filling the air .

It came into view over the tree tops and it was massive. Ryuuken met it's hollow dead eyes.

He had to destroy the mask in the first hit, as he could feel fatigue eat away at his senses. He wouldn't be able to make the second shot.

Concentration on keeping the mask in focus, he began to draw the bow that magically started to appear out of nowhere. It came so naturally to him. He didn't even have to think about it – it seemed spirit particles haw always obeyed him even if he didn't want them to.

Having gathered the necessary spirit energy he began drawing back. The hollow was coming towards him fast now, having felt the real amount of spirit particles that was collecting like a huge treat.

His muscles ached and shook with the strain. He grimaced as he tried drawing it harder. It had to be stronger. He had to be stronger.

At this rate the bow wouldn't meet it's target.

He pushed himself even further, gained a few extra centimeters, and go of the bow, letting it run it's course.

In the very same second a bow flew just past his right ear, met up with his own bow and met the mask of the hollow simultaneously. The mask split it two and the hollow evaporated into nothingness.

Ryuuken breathed - or he tried to. He was panting.

As he turned around he half expected to see his father, which was silly, since the man had been dead for years. He could feel that his mind was slipping. Perhaps his fever had returned.

Uryuu.

His own son was the one standing behind him. He had that same grim look on his face that he always had when they were in the same room. It would have been funny if it wasn't so sad.

Uryuu looked as if he was bracing himself for a verbal conflict.

Ryuuken hardly had anymore energy left, letting his arms slump down his sides lifelessly he let his gaze drop to the ground in front of him. The pain came back with a vengeance.

"You okay?" Uryuu asked somewhat insecure, but still with a harsh tone.

Ryuuken shook his head lightly, when he knees suddenly buckled underneath him and he let himself succumb to the fatigue that took hold of him. He was dimly aware of the world turning around and Uryuu speaking to him before darkness consumed him completely.


	7. Chapter 7

Withering 7

Of all the things Uryuu has expected to encounter that night, his father losing consciousness in front of him in the park was not one of them.  
He supposed it was ridiculous of him, but he still half expected someone was pulling his leg.

Ichigo approached from behind, "Did you get it?" he asked, penetrating this the silence. He stopped dead in his tracks, when he saw the unconscious figure lying in front of Uryuu, "What the hell happened?"

"He... eh," Uryuu started, but couldn't quite finish. He kept shaking his head.

"He what?" Ichigo demanded and walked past Uryuu and kneeled by he fallen man. Turning him over on his back Ichigo immediately saw the similarity to Uryuu.

"This is your father? Isn't it?" Ichigo was now looking at Uryuu half concerned half mad, "-What the hell happened?" He repeated in a hard tone of voice.

"I don't know, alright!" Uryuu countered angrily, "- he was just sorta there suddenly and then he just collapsed."

Ichigo furrowed his brows. Uryuu wasn't making much sense at all. Old man Ishida was pale as a sheet and was breathing strangely loud and irregular.

Well, he was alive at least.

Ichigo put his hand to the gray haired's forehead, "Shit, he's burning up." He looked at Uryuu again who seemed weirdly against reacting or doing anything remotely helpful at all. Ichigo sighed and produced his mobile phone, speed dialed it, and waited.

"Yo Dad, you're not gonna believe this." Ichigo began, but was clearly cut short. Ichigo immediately looked annoyed.

"Yes, Uryuu got the hollow. Yes, it felt like a big one. No, I was not there..."

"Dad, listen! Uryuu's father seemingly collapsed here and he has a fever. I can't get much out of Uryuu, but..."

"Dad?" Ichigo asked when he was uncharacteristically quiet. "Good, we'll see you then."

"Is he coming?" Uryuu asked in a surprisingly small voice.

"Yes, he'll be here in 10 minutes' time," Ichigo answered, "Is your father sick?"

Uryuu ventured a step closer and looked more intently at his father.

"Not that I know of," Uryuu answered, "-he looks so much smaller than I remember him."

"Remember him?" Ichigo repeated in surprise.

"It's been more than a year since I last saw him... we don't get along" Uryuu admitted and crossed his arms, suddenly feeling cold. Ichigo eyed him for a moment. Uryuu and himself were extremely different people and even though he didn't get his father most of the time he still couldn't imagine being so estranged from him that they wouldn't speak. It seemed like a very alien idea to him. He supposed Uryuu had his strange demeanor from somewhere – it wouldn't be surprising if his father was alike him.

Ryuuken chose that moment to begin to stir. His breathing became more and more erratic and it was rather clear that he was having trouble breathing. He started coughing with this deep hollow sound that chilled Ichigo to the bone. The older man was still not quite conscious, but panic drove him to make him sit up to elevate his chest. With one arm clutching his chest and the other supporting his trembling weight on the ground Ryuuken coughed so hard it seemed to Ichigo that the man in front of him was shrinking – if that was even possible. Ichigo hardly knew what to do with himself and Uryuu even more so. He was just walking back and forth with his arms crossed and a grim look on his face like a caged animal.

It wasn't until blood began to appear between Ryuuken's fingers that the seriousness of the situation really dawned upon Uryuu.

"Something is really wrong," Ichigo whispered mostly to himself.

"Maybe we should call an ambulance in stead of your father," Uryuu answered, suddenly strangely collected.

The coughing stopped abruptly and Ryuuken lost consciousness again and slumped to the ground again.

Isshin could hardly believe his eyes when he saw his old friend lifeless lying on the ground.

The kids were looking towards him wide eyed and alarmed.

"Is he breathing?" Isshin heard himself say before he got so close he could hear the doctor's rattling breath.

"Yes, but there is something wrong," Ichigo answered hastily, "-he's coughing blood."

Isshin heart froze for a second. As he got closer his gaze quickly closed in on the fresh blood that smeared Ryuuken's lips and chin. It also stained the shirt and there were dark spots in the dirt. It was a lot of blood to cough up..

"Is he injured?" Isshin kneeled down besides his son and ripped the ailing man's shirt apart, not bothering with the buttons. "Is he injured," he bellowed, looking straight at his son.

"I, I, I, don't know. I didn't see what happened," Ichigo stuttered with wild fluttering eyes.

"I'm not sure either," came a much more collected statement from Uryuu, "- he was already here when I arrived, but he was somehow hesitant in the way he drew his bow." Uryuu looked at the ground with a furrowed brow, "-he was shaking… now that I think about it."

"So he manipulated spirit particles," Isshin concluded and returned his attention to Ryuuken, examining his rib cage, which protruded painfully from under the skin. There were no bruises or abnormalities to be found, "-a foolish thing to be doing in his condition."

Ryuuken began frowning and opened his pain clouded eyes. He instantly made eye contact with Isshin.

"It seems…," he croaked and coughed wetly, "-I was wrong."

"About anything in particular?" Isshin asked more softly, as he gently and slowly helped the other man to sit up.

"It seems…" Ryuuken panted in between every other 2 words, "-I'm worse off than I thought I was."

"Well, you shouldn't have manipulated. You know how much of a toll it takes on the body if it's wounded or sick," Isshin grinned hesitantly, "-especially as the Quincy grows older. You haven't used your powers in a while, have you?"

Ryuuken shook his slowly, reminiscing how he once had seen his own father, injured and bleeding profusely, in immense pain after having fired a bow at a hollow. He could scarcely believe that he was reaching that age himself.

He suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable. Uryuu… he had completely forgotten that he was there as well. He caught a sideways glance of his son and predictably he was listening intently to their conversation. Anything to do the Quincy way interested him greatly. It always had.

He never understood that. Being Quincy only meant that everyone around you died before their time.

"Can you walk?" Isshin suddenly asked, breaking Ryuuken's chain of thought. Ryuuken's entire body shook with the effort of just sitting up and he seriously doubted his own strength. The pain came and went in waves and his lungs worked as hard as they could – to no avail it seemed.

However, he had to walk. He wouldn't let himself show so much weakness in front of his son. He wouldn't allow it.

"I believe so," Ryuuken answered without much conviction and prayed that Uryuu wouldn't notice his shaky legs.

Much to his surprise Isshin placed his arm around his waist at his first sign of movement. Isshin pretty much hauled Ryuuken up and trying his best to disguise it.

Without a word they slowly made their way to the car. Ryuuken's knees gave out a couple of times when the pain intensified, but he found himself still standing due to Isshin's supporting arm. He would thank him later.

After they reached the car and he sat down Ryuuken closed his eyes for a second. After that he didn't register anymore.

Isshin was a little surprised that Uryuu followed them and entered the car as well. Granted, he did wait until he saw his father lost consciousness again before doing so.

"Can you do anything for him?" Ichigo asked quietly and looking at Ryuuken limp form.

"I can help him get rid of the pneumonia, but he probably set back his recovery some time by using his Quincy powers while being so sick," Isshin answered and sighed heavily, "-but he needs to quit smoking.. His lungs are in bad state."

"How bad?" Isshin heard Uryuu ask carefully, as though trying not to wake Ryuuken.

"He has apparently experienced so much discomfort that he considered cancer," Isshin felt how the atmosphere changed once he mentioned that, "-I saw the x-ray though and there was no cancer. However, his lungs are beginning to scar and he can't seem to get rid of the pneumonia. It's now vital to save as much lung function as possible, 'cause he won't regain any of that he has already lost."

"And coughing blood is not a good thing," Uryuu concluded mostly to himself.

"No, it's not." Isshin confirmed. He hadn't imagined that Ryuuken was that sick. Well, he hadn't imagined that Ryuuken would use his powers either. He had thought those days to long gone.

Isshin felt guilty for not reacting properly on the x-ray. He knew that Ryuuken was a physician himself and should have reacted on it himself, but it still didn't help the way he felt.

And he was tired. It had been a long night.

He installed Ryuuken on of the beds in the clinic. Ichigo silently helped him without him having to tell him what to do. He felt his heart swell with pride for a moment. It didn't take long before Ryuuken was resting, hooked up to heart rate monitors and an oxygen mask.

Ryuuken experienced another bloody coughing fit a couple of hours ago, where he began to turn blue around the lips and Isshin was forced to administer oxygen. It had also been necessary to administer a drug to help his blood clot. However, this greatly increasing the risk of a blood clot.

His little clinic was really not equipped to handle a patient like this, as there wasn't enough personnel to monitor Ryuuken. Isshin made do with the help of Ichigo and Uryuu, whom was still around. They were under strict orders to come and get him if anything happened.

Uryuu didn't quite know which leg to stand on. He didn't like his father. He knew that much.

He would even go as far as to say he hated his father. He disliked just about everything he stood for.

This was very clear in his mind and still he sat here beside his father's bed. He had hardly spent any time with him the last two years. He hadn't wanted to spend any time with him at all. It wasn't pity that kept him here.

Something had changed. Seeing his father like that, weak and sick, was so unlike how he remembered him, Ryuuken almost seemed like a completely different person. That proud intolerable know-it-all Ryuuken he knew had vanished for a time and he studied the new Ryuuken that was left behind with a morbid fascination.

This Ryuuken was much smaller and much less imposing. Taking into account the still considerable height difference, he suspected that Ryuuken was even thinner and more fragile than him at the moment. It was a curious thought indeed.

No, it wasn't pity that kept him here. It was a strange curiosity. Almost like the first time he realized that his father wasn't perfect so many years ago as a child– except he wasn't disappointed. It was the strangest feeling.

When Ryuuken still hadn't come too late in the afternoon, Ichigo especially, began to worry. Ryuuken was as pale as the sheets he was lying on and his breathing hadn't really improved much either. Isshin had stopped giving him the drug that helped him clot, as Ryuuken hadn't coughed anymore blood after the second attack.

"Are you sure he's alright? I mean… are you sure he shouldn't be in the hospital?" Ichigo asked looking up from his home work.

"The fever has lowered a bit," Isshin answered and looked are Ryuuken's chart again, "-that means the antibiotics are kicking in. The rest the hospital can do nothing about. Only time and rest will… and food. He needs to eat the second he wakes up," Isshin looked at the two boys, "-please make sure that he does."

Ichigo nodded slowly and Uryuu looked a bit like a deer caught in the head light.

"I think I need to be heading home," Uryuu suddenly concluded. Ichigo whipped around to at the other boy in shock. Ichigo couldn't imagine acting like that, if it was his father that was lying there.

"What the hell do you mean?" He asked hard.

"I mean exactly what I said. I've already missed one day of school… I see no point in missing a second," Uryuu asked cooly, as he gathered his things.

"It's your father," Ichigo added and looked at the incapacitated man again, "-no matter your history, he's still your father… for heaven's sake, he's the only family you've got."

"We don't exactly treat each other as family."

"What happened between you two?" Ichigo asked carefully, returning his gaze to the young raven haired man. Uryuu sighed heavily and made to leave.

"It's a long story… filled with disappointments," he answered on his way out.

Ichigo looked at the empty door frame with a dispassionate look on his face. He didn't care what Uryuu said – leaving one's father like that was just wrong. Hell, he didn't even know the man and he still stayed around.


	8. Chapter 8

**Withering 8**

Ryuuken began to stir around 8 o'clock that evening and like Ichigo had suspected, his father was by his side in a second. Ichigo wanted to stay. He was quite curious as to how Ryuuken was like, but from what he could gather, Ishida senior was a proud man, and he decided to leave the room, while the man regained his senses. He could suitably try to make a sandwich, as Ryuuken probably would be absolutely famished.

Ryuuken immediatly reached for the oxygen mask. Without being fully conscious he fumbled with it and it just ended up on the side of his face instead.

"Easy," Isshin chanted and he carefully removed the mask. The other doctor's face began contort from pain.

"Pain still bad?" Isshin asked in a low voice. Ryuuken nodded slightly and Isshin felt himself release a breath he hadn't known he was holding, "-I could put you on morphine?"

Ryuuken shook his head, "-no morphine…" he wheezed out in a weak voice, "-can't handle the dreams."

It was a known side effect that morphine could induce very realistic dreams and night mares. So he had tried it before.

"Then once you get some food in your stomach I'll get you some ibuprofen." Isshin smiled a little – Ryuuken was much more lucid that he had he had expected him to be.

"Do you know what time it is? What day?" Isshin asked and utilized the fact that Ryuuken opened his eyes to quickly check his pupil reaction.

"Feels like I've been asleep for days,"

"It's tuesday evening. You've been out for 14 hours," Isshin answered as he put the small flash light away, satisfied with he reaction, "-how about the lungs?"

Ryuuken took a couple of deeper breaths. To anyone else they would have been quite shallow.

"Chest's tight," he replied, "-but it's not too bad."

Isshin sighed and sat down on the side of the bed.

"You've lost lung function so slowly that you haven't noticed how bad it really has become," Isshin said in a serious voice, "-I think your lung function is down to 50% at the moment. However, I don't have the equipment here to measure it.

Ryuuken scratched his nose with badly shaking fingers.

"I need a smoke," he croaked out and hid his shaky hands beneath the covers.

"You need nothing of a kind," Isshin spat, "I'll get you a nicotine patch... you know how you'll end up if you continue this. Your lungs show overwhelming signs of damage."

Ryuuken met Isshin's eyes. His eyes were possibly eve harder without glasses, steel grey and ice cold.

Isshin just shook his head in frustration and left the other doctor to himself. He sighed heavily to himself - sometimes it felt like getting a unwilling horse to drink water when all he could do was to lead it to the trough. It was frustrating how stubborn Ryuuken was, but he supposed that by now Ryuuken was stuck in his track and would be difficult to change his habits so dramatically as was needed. Also Ryuuken had a hard time dealing with situation – ever since Isshin met him for the first time, he was an independent person. He always handled the challenges that came his way on his own and by the Gods, did some challenges come his way.

Ryuuken's ability to adapt and drive seemed to vanish little by little for every new challenge. He became more and more indifferent to everything. Now he'd even quit his job.

Now that Isshin thought about it, it seemed more and more out of character of him to quit his job without a fight. Obviously he thought he'd made himself indispensable and then again, not really.

Isshin felt a horrible sinking feeling that made him stop dead in his track. Maybe Ryuuken had expected himself to be dying and simply accepted the fact.

That would mean that he was being actively self destructive.

Ichigo entered the sick room with a plated sandwich, quite content with the result of his effort. He felt more at ease seeing his father's friend conscious again. He couldn't help to smile at the fact that Ryuuken had very similar eyes to Uryuu.

"I fixed you a sandwich," Ichigo said and put the plate down on the table next to the bed, "-I figured you might be hungry."

However, Ryuuken looked at the food with next to no interest.

"You must be Ichigo," Ishida deflected and met the young man's gaze.

Ichigo suddenly felt ill at ease with all the weight of Ryuuken's attention on him.

"I am," Ichigo owned.

"I suppose we haven't officially met yet.. I'm Ishida Ryuuken," Ryuuken introduced himself. Ichigo winced at the formality, but bowed respectfully, his red bangs falling into his eyes. He really needed a haircut.

"Kurosaki Ichigo."

"I understand that you are a friend of my son," Ryuuken then began in a lighter tone.

"Sort of… he's not too fond of the Shinigami Quincy hanging out thing," Ichigo explained, adjusting the collar of his polo shirt at the same time, "-but it has helped that I lost my powers… I mean friendship wise."

Ryuuken had a hard time masking a strange smile. So Uryuu had listened to the history between the shinigami and the Quincies.

The pain whipped back across his chest with a vengeance. The retched cough immediately followed, leaving him gasping for breath. He must have made quite a scene, 'cause Ichigo face was one of shock and alarm.

"Should I get my father?" Ichigo asked, speaking way too fast in a tone that was too high for him.

Ryuuken shook his head and tried getting his breathing under control. It demanded just about all of his will power calming himself as the pain forced his body into high gear. His breathing wheezed now, but at least he was getting air into his battered lungs. He decided to ignore the horribly sound.

"How is he?"

"How is who?" Ichigo immediately asked, not quite following and watching the other man like a hawk for signs that he was going to faint.

"Uryuu."

"He's good I suppose," Ichigo began slowly, "- taking things way too seriously, but I suppose that's Ishida-kun for you." He eyed Ryuuken with an examining look, "-he was here, you know… until a couple of hours ago."

The saddest look swept across Ryuuken's features before it vanished as quickly as it came.

"Ichigo you should get your homework done and go to bed. You have school tomorrow."

Ichigo hadn't heard his dad enter the room and whipped around, startled.

Ryuuken's eyes followed Ichigo's retreating form and his gaze lingered at the door opening for a while.

"You have a good boy there," Ryuuken concluded in a strained voice.

"I know," Isshin said with a warm smile and began unwrapping the nicotine patch. Handing it over to Ryuuken he sat down heavily next the bed and Ryuuken could see from the way he carried himself that he was immensely tired.

"You should get some sleep," Ryuuken managed to croak out before lapsing into another coughing fit. He groaned at the pain it caused him, but he immediately forced it down when a metallic tasted hit the back of his throat. He swallowed tentatively and checked to see if Isshin noticed anything.

"What?" Isshin asked hard, clearly suspicious.

"You should go get some sleep," Ryuuken repeated, acting as if Isshin didn't hear him the first time, "-I will be fine. I'll just sleep."

Isshin brows were furrowed – a clear sign that he wasn't buying it.

"Let me listen to your chest," Isshin didn't wait for Ryuuken to protest, but got up and found his stethoscope. I wasn't until that moment Ryuuken realized that he was in a strange t-shirt that he didn't recognize. At least they had left his own trousers on. In one fluid movement he took it off and bared his emaciated upper torso.

"You are painful to look at," Isshin said with feeling. Apart from Ryuuken's bones, his tendons showed clearly through the pale skin.

"I've always been thin," Ryuuken tried to argue.

"This is beyond thin, Ryuuken… you must know that."

It was a struggle for Ryuuken to allow the cold stethoscope against his skin without shying away from it.

"Breathe in," Isshin demanded in a hushed voice as he listened intently, "-and out."

Isshin moved the stethoscope around his chest, both front and back and the pattern repeated itself many times over. Ryuuken patiently complied and focused his energy on not coughing. He was getting tired again, which he found odd since he'd just woken up after sleeping the whole day.

"Ryuuken!" he heard and his eyes shot open. He must've dozed off for a moment. He met Isshin eyes, whom was practically holding him upright, "-lean back."

Ryuuken did so slowly and Isshin didn't let go until he was lying safely against the pillow.

"You almost tumbled off the bed," Isshin breathed.

"Sorry, I think I feel asleep," Ryuuken mumbled as his eyes closed again.

"Don't fall asleep yet," Isshin placed his hand on his should again, "-not before you've eaten something." Isshin gestured the sandwich.

Ryuuken groaned. If there was one thing he didn't feel like doing it was to eat.

"Come on," Isshin continued, "-you won't get any better if you don't eat.

Ryuuken gave Isshin a hard look and reluctantly picked up the sandwich.

Ryuuken picked a bit of the bread, but it seemed as though it grew inside his mouth. It took a good swig of water to get it down.

However, surprisingly enough after the first bite, his stomach growled loudly and at least half of the sandwich disappeared quite quickly after that.

Isshin chuckled satisfied and leaned back until Ryuuken put the remainders of the sandwich down.

"I can't get anything more down now," Ryuuken concluded and looked at the half eaten meal, "-which is kinda sad."

"Don't worry about it – Rome wasn't built in a day," Isshin yawned dramatically and stretched, "-lie back down before you fall down," he added when he saw Ryuuken dozing off again while sitting up. He opened his eyes again and straightened up.

"What's the verdict then?" he asked

"Verdict?"

"My lungs"

Isshin sighed.

"They are not healthy at all. We'll have to wait until the pneumonia clears out before I can come with anything definitive. I wouldn't be surprised if you had developed smoker's lungs or maybe chronic bronchitis." Isshin concluded and rubbed his eyes, "-you should see a lung specialist when you're better."

"Quincies are quick healers," Ryuuken added. Isshin smiled.

"You just human, Ryuuken. Lung tissue lost won't be regenerated, even by Quincies."

Ryuuken fell asleep just after a couple of minutes of silence.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: To all my reviewers :) I love you! You totally keep me going. I realize that my Ryuuken is a bit more mellow than the Ryuuken portrayed in the manga and anime, but to me he doesn't seem very human at all to me. I think it more believable that he is a tormented poor soul that doesn't know to cope when life throws him a losing hand. Despite his achievements in his work life as a doctor and director of a hospital, he seems very unfortunate in everything else. But that's just my opinion - feel free to object.  
Anyways, here's the next chapter :) I hope you like it.

**Withering 9**

Isshin yawned and looked around, considering his options for sleeping arrangements. He couldn't just leave Ryuuken to fend for himself during the night - especially now that he was without oxygen again.

At least he was off the blood clotting drugs, that reassured him quite a bit. They were extremely dangerous and he's been careful to put him on a minimum dose.

Isshin decided for dragging a mattress down in the room. That would enable him to check on Ryuuken regularly through the night.

Isshin's sleep was disturbed countless times during the night by Ryuuken's harsh coughs. Strangely enough the other man didn't seem to be too much disturbed by these himself.

The antibiotics had knocked down the fever surprisingly quickly. Maybe Ryuuken was right about the Quincies being quick healers. Right or not though, he had definitely worked himself too hard.

Isshin finally slipped into a deep dreamless sleep and he didn't wake until he was woken by one of his assistents.

"Kurosaki-sama, wake up," her gentle words made him sit up with a start, "-did you sleep here?"

Isshin just groaned an rubbed his eyes.

"yes, I had to keep an eye on…," Isshin he answered tiredly and gestured the sick bed… which was empty. "Where the hell is he?"

"Ishida-sama?" she asked confused.

"Yes," Isshin roared a bit annoyed and stormed out the door with his young assistant hot on his heels.

"He's drinking tea with us in the personnel room," she added casually

Ryuuken was fully dressed in his flawless suit, his shirt was quite crinkled though after having slept in it on Isshin's couch the day before. He looked better now with the fever down and after well more than a good night's sleep.

Isshin's young receptionist was clearly flirting with him and he was trying to handle it as gracefully as possible, hiding his discreet smirk in his tea cup.

"You're up," Isshin established dumbfound

"So are you," Ryuuken replied with a rough voice.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well I've slept for God knows how long," Ryuuken began and took another sip of the tea, "-I couldn't sleep any longer. I figured I might be able to help out a bit in your little clinic here, as you're probably behind because of me."

Isshin sat down heavily besides the other doctor.

"Seriously?" Isshin started, "-your fever just broke from a double sided multi resistant strain of pneumonia and you figured you'd come and help me out." He sighed dramatically. "-if you want to help out, then do so a couple of days next week. Right now you're going nowhere but home to rest some more."

"I have a hard time doing nothing," Ryuuken admitted hesitantly.

"I know. You can come here when you're better."

"But what do I do until I'm better?"

"Relax, watch television, read a book… whatever you like… just don't smoke too much," Isshin anwered, shrugging his shoulders, "we could say that you can come in and take consultations Tuesday and Thursday next week, if you're feeling up to it."

Ryuuken nodded and got up slowly. He still felt quite weak, even though he was feeling dramatically better because of the antibiotics cocktail.

"Do you mind calling me a cab?" he politely asked the receptionist that kept staring and smiling at him. She nodded eagerly and disappeared into the office.

"You don't have to go right this moment," Isshin said, suddenly feeling like he was kicking Ryuuken out.

"No no, I should get going." Ryuuken gave half a smile, "-it was nice to meet you both."

Outside Ryuuken's hands were fidgeting with the urge to produce a cigarette from his pocket. However, he knew better than to do so while he was still at Isshin's and fortunately the nicotine patch was still effective. The patch didn't activate his hands though - he felt quite awkward, not knowing what to do with them.

"Make sure you get something to eat," Isshin immediately began fuzzing when he came out. Last week that would have earned him a nasty remark from Ryuuken, but he was feeling better and he felt his patience level rising a bit.

"I'm sure I can get Mitsumi to cook something." He replied softly.

"Who ?"

"My house keeper."

"Oh yeah, some us can afford such luxuries," Isshin commented dryly.

"I'm hardly ever home. How would I be able to keep such a large house?"

"Hmm… perhaps you should consider moving to a smaller one. Maybe even an apartment." Isshin had never understood why he continued to live in that big house all alone. He supposed he secretly wished that at least Uryuu would come home some time.

"Make sure to stop by the pharmacy," Isshin chanted. He closed his eyes an faced the sun, allowing it's rays to warm face. Ryuuken followed his example. It was really starting to get warmer here in May.

"I will," Ryuuken sighed, "-anything else would be stupid," he added, a tad annoyed.

"Of course," Isshin answered and smiled at the sun, not opening his eyes, "-and don't start writing job applications just yet. Allow yourself some freedom."

"Freedom is in the eye of he beholder."


	10. Chapter 10

Withering 10

Much to his displeasure Mitsumi wasn't there when Ryuuken arrived home with a bag full of medical supplies in his arms. Taking off his shoes he found the floor to be immensely cold. Was it always that chilly?

He unloaded in the kitchen and with nothing better to do he began arraying the different bottles of medicine in neat straight lines on the kitchen table. He leaned over the table and looked at the result for a couple of minutes with blank eyes, tweaked a couple a bit and decided he really needed to find something to keep him busy. His hands weren't shaking like when he was craving the nicotine, but he couldn't keep them still either.

He suddenly felt uncomfortable in the clothes that he's been wearing for far too long – he needed a bath, a good warm long one, and some fresh clothes. When he turned around he realized he had a cigarette in his hand.

He looked at it with intent – it wasn't lit, so it wasn't too late to put it back. It was egging in his to produce the lighter. A purging sigh later he removed his gaze from it and put it away.

He hadn't realized how used to smoking he really was. He could almost do it without noticing.

Ryuuken tried laying down on the sofa, but he was unable to lay still. He found it quite stressful; his fingers kept fidgeting with his shirt or whatever he could reach. He simply wasn't equipped to do nothing.

Sitting up and carefully contemplated what he could do. He could always write job applications.

Ryuuken found himself walking the halls until he decided that he could tidy up his office, not so much the room, but all his papers. Thoroughly he put all of his papers in chronological order and but all the folders neatly in place and made sure that the front was in line with the rest. It only took a couple of hours as he normally was quite careful with his official papers.

Then again he found himself idle and restless and not knowing how to cope. Carelessly he suddenly found himself in rooms he rarely came in. The rooms with all of his late wife's earthly possessions.

He stopped dead in his tracks… and stared wide eyed at all those memories they brought forward. By the Gods he missed her. His life wasn't supposed to turn out this way. Alone… and bitter.

Once upon a time he was a young successful doctor, happily married. They already had one son and they were discussing a second child. He had suspected that she was pregnant when she died, but he couldn't bring himself to ask. It all suddenly seemed so irrelevant.

He didn't handle grief very well. He simply didn't handle it at all and buried himself in work.

He was on his knees. He couldn't remember when that had happened, but he let gravity claim him even further and curled up on the floor amidst her things and wept.

He wept until he could hardly breathe and then resumed to coughing until he was positively choking.

He lay there wheezing for an undetermined amount of time. Picking himself of the floor he found himself immensely heavy – maybe he was just weak, but the world seemed to have different weight. He was back in that hole again.

He found the liquor cabinet. He knew it was a bad choice, but he couldn't handle this feeling. He didn't want to handle feeling this way. With a brand new bottle of scotch and a glass, he drank himself to oblivion and passed out a couple of hours later.

When his Isshin's calls to Ryuuken wasn't returned on the second day he got worried and took matters into his own hands. He found himself getting more and more anxious as he approached the Ishida estate that evening. There was no lights on in the house – it was completely dark.

He knocked furiously on the door, but it was answered. He began walking around the house, looking through the windows, trying to spot Ryuuken in any of the rooms.

He spotted Ryuuken sprawled upon the large couch in the living room, clearly unconscious, but breathing. He also noticed a rather suspiciously mostly empty bottle of scotch beside the sleeping figure.

He knocked as hard as he dared on the window. Ryuuken began to stir, so he knocked faster. Suddenly Ryuuken jumped to his feet and made direct eye contact with Isshin. Isshin put on his most annoyed facial expression and pointed towards the front door.

It was a very haggard looking Ryuuken that opened the door.

"What?" he asked subdued.

"Why the hell aren't you answering your phone?" Isshin countered in a hard voice.

Ryuuken looked a little confused and turned around to look, but stumbled halfway.

"Are you drunk?" Isshin asked disbelievingly. Ryuuken looked at him as if it didn't matter.

"A little," he confessed and continued into the living room, where the cell phone was nowhere to be seen.

Isshin followed him even though he hadn't been officially been invited. The house was a cold and empty as ever and Isshin found himself shivering.

"How about I call your phone and we'll find it?"

Ryuuken just nodded.

Isshin was a good deal quicker than Ryuuken and found the cell in the office which was maniacally neat and tidy. Ryuuken has placed himself on the couch again and was pouring himself a glass of scotch. Isshin quickly intervened by snatching the glass before Ryuuken could react.

"Thanks for offering," Isshin commented in a sarcastic tone. Ryuuken seemed incapable of reacting to anything and without saying a word he fetched another glass for himself. Isshin studied him.

"What happened to you?" Isshin asked carefully. Ryuuken didn't meet his eyes, but slowly poured himself some scotch and took a large swig of it. He stared into the brown liquid.

"I went up to my wife's rooms today." Ryuuken whispered. Realization dawned upon Isshin with that sentence, but he couldn't help but to make a face at Ryuuken referring to her as wife instead of her name.

"I'll drink to her," Isshin saluted Ryuuken, whom didn't react and downed the contents of the glass completely. Ryuuken copied the action a couple of seconds later.

"Have you even thrown anything of hers' out?"

Ryuuken shook his head.

"Nothing? This is your house Ryuuken, this is not a museum," Isshin tried to gain eye contact, but Ryuuken seemed content to look at the table. Content was the wrong word though– he had rarely seen anyone look so sad in his entire life as Ryuuken did.

"I can't live here anymore," Ryuuken suddenly said, "- it'll kill me faster than anything else will."

"I think you're right," Isshin agreed and leaned back, "-but start with throwing your wife's stuff out. You don't need it. It will only drag you down. Keep a few things that means something to you and give Uryuu the chance to pick some things out as well." He sighed, "-it'll be good for the both of you."

"How's it going with your medication?" Isshin then asked casually suddenly remembering. That earned him a long hard stare from Ryuuken whom looked a little confused again.

"I don't know," he began, "-I've lost track of time."

Isshin sighed in defeat and pinched the bridge of his nose. Ryuuken was a hopeless drunk when he was in this mood

"Where are they?"

"What?"

"The pills!"

"erm, they are on the kitchen counter," Ryuuken responded quietly and started to find his pack of cigarettes. As soon as he had put one to his lips, Isshin ripped it away and crushed it with his fist.

"In the first place you shouldn't drink when you're on antibiotics. You know perfectly well! Secondly, you smoke too much when you're drinking," Isshin scolded loudly on his way out to the kitchen.

"You make it sound like I'm an alcoholic," Ryuuken commented angrily as he lighted a new cigarette. Isshin came back with the meds in his hands.

"Sometimes, I think you are an alcoholic."

Ryuuken took a long drag of the cigarette and coughed wetly upon exhaling.

"I resent that."

"I'm sure you do," Isshin said in a more mellow tone, "-now, I'm glad to see that the seals has been broken on all these bottles." Isshin continued while opening one of them. However, he found that the secondary seal underneath the screw top was still intact. His facial expression changed dramatically, "-you are a Goddamned fool, Ryuuken. I should have you committed to a psych ward right away."

Ryuuken gave him a puzzled look.

"You are obviously trying to kill yourself," Isshin argued. Ryuuken looked shocked for a moment, but then made a dismissive gesture with his hand that held the lit cigarette.

"You're fool if that's what you're thinking," He said and inhaled off the cigarette again. He didn't seem to be able to smoke without coughing, which should have been a clue, but Ryuuken didn't seem to pay his body any heed. He dissolved completely into a fully fledged coughing fit.

By the look of him, doubling over, it appeared to be very painful and Isshin noticed his eyes started watering. He was having a hard time breathing in between the spasms and he was beginning to sound like he was choking. Isshin immediate abandoned the idea of fetching him a glass of water, as that would only help with a dry cough – this cough was anything but.

"Don't panic," Isshin chanted in a soothing voice, but Ryuuken was already beyond that. He was not getting enough oxygen and his body seemed to scream for air. Panic struck him hard and he suddenly stood up..

However, as soon as Ryuuken rose, he went limp. He crashed down between the couch and the coffee table, hitting his head and god knows what on the way down. The coughing stopped and was replaced with an ear deafening rattling wheeze.


	11. Chapter 11

**Withering 11**

Isshin jumped over and removed the burning cigarette, which was in the process of igniting the carpet. Putting it out in the ash tray, he didn't miss smoking one little bit. With a powerful movement he moved the couch back in order to get to Ryuuken.

Limp as a rag doll, it proved rather difficult to get a hold of Ryuuken so that he could carry him to bed. He then noticed that his right arm was moving strangely. Unbuttoning Ryuuken's shirt he revealed a shoulder, that didn't quite look right. Moving it about and putting the other hand to the joint, he found it to be dislocated.

Ryuuken have should praised himself lucky that he was still unconscious. A dislocation was extremely painful. He knew it would be easier for all parties if he could force the joint back in place, before he woke up. However, it had been ages and ages ago since he last tried getting a shoulder back into its socket, so he didn't have much confidence in himself. The alternative was getting an unconscious Ryuuken to the hospital.

Isshin sighed – he would never hear the end of it, if he didn't get that shoulder back into place. He carefully placed a knee on Ryuuken's collar bone and grabbed his arm firmly and began manipulating the joint. He could see Ryuuken frowning in pain, even though he was passed out – he could wake up any moment. Isshin hardly dared to breathe. When his arms starting shaking with the effort and he hadn't succeeded, he took a break to collect energy and concentration. God, he hated ortho with a passion. He took a deep breath and tried again and this time the shoulder popped into place with a sickening pop.. Just as it did so Isshin's knee slipped of Ryuuken's collarbone to his ribs and Isshin very nearly tumbled down on top of him. He couldn't help but chuckle, but the humor of it quickly wore of as he looked at Ryuuken's face that was relaxed again. It would have been mightily funny had the other doctor been awake.

This time when he tried to get a hold of Ryuuken he had more luck. Yet again he was amazed how light the other man was.

Ryuuken's bed was ridiculously large and his one pillow and cover didn't take up much space. Isshin realized that it was probably the same bed he had slept in with his wife.

He felt his brows after laying him in a comfortable position. He was running a fever again. Finding pillows in the closets he propped him up so that he almost sat up right in order for him to breathe better.

Isshin then found all the meds again and a glass of water and tried waking Ryuuken – he needed to get back on the antibiotics as quickly as possible.

He proved difficult to wake, but Isshin blamed that on the damned liquor. He got him conscious enough to swallow the pills and drink the water. He immediately fell asleep again afterwards.

Ryuuken woke up feeling like a train wreck. He had the mother of all headaches and there was a persistent sun beam that insisted upon shining him in the face. His chest was heavy and tight with the urge to cough. As he tried to reach out after his glasses with his right arm, he yelped in pain, which set off a fit of coughing.

He stumbled out of the bed and found left knee quite sore as well. What the hell had he been doing last night?

Now with his left hand he picked up the glasses from his night stand. Still half coughing he limped out to the bathroom.

In front of the mirror the removed his shirt and was quite surprised to find his shoulder bruised purple – practically all the way down to his right nipple. The shoulder was angry and swollen and extremely sore when he tried to move it.

Ryuuken didn't even recognize the pants he was wearing. How drunk had he been? Wait, these were some of Uryuu's old training pants. They had been far too long for his son at the time. Could he really fit into those? His sunken in stomach choose that moment to growl loudly and ache with idleness.

Then he noticed someone rustling in the kitchen. Mitsumi didn't usually meet in this early. He took one swift step out of the bathroom and then stopped dead in his tracks. Even the slight movement og walking jarred his shoulder. He put his left hand firm around his upper right arm to support the injured joint and continued toward the kitchen in a slower pace.

He found Isshin cooking porridge and making an omelet and frying bacon at the same time.

"What are you doing here?" Ryuuken asked with a voice that almost failed him. He coughed hard a couple of times.

Isshin turned around with a marvelous grin on his face.

"Ah, you're up, princess," Isshin quickly eyed the bruise, "-that looks rather evil. Are you alright?"

"Somewhat," he began, "-what happened last night?"

"You're were drunk as a skunk, but carrying it quite well until you coughed till you passes out and busted your shoulder in the fall," Isshin smiled a bit, "-do you know how long it's been since I've put a shoulder back in place?"

"No, but I'm feeling it," Ryuuken commented in a dry tone and moved the said shoulder about a bit.

"You should consider popping by the hospital later and have them x-ray it – make sure it' not broken. Has that happened to you before?"

"Has what happened?" Ryuuken was finding it hard to keep track of Isshin's rantings and the head ache had yet to improve.

"Have you dislocated your shoulder before?"

"Yes, it happened numerous times when I was young. Happened a couple of times in the last couple of years as well," Ryuuken explained and let himself drop to one of the chairs that surrounded the table in the kitchen.

Isshin quickly placed a glass of water and a whole array of pills in front of him.

"You'd been slacking off with the medication. It has to stop now," Isshin scolded.

Ryuuken just massaged his forehead.

"Does this water also come with some aspirin?"

"Nope, but it does come with a western style breakfast," Isshin said proudly and began plating the food. Ryuuken had to admit that he found the smell strangely appetizing, even if he was a bit hung over.

"You shouldn't sit there shirtless," Isshin then noticed, "-it's pretty cold." He disappeared into the master bedroom and opened the closet and began rummaging around for something suitable.

"Do you have anything but insanely expensive designer shirts?" He yelled.

"I'm afraid not," Ryuuken answered, having followed the other man.

"Not even a sweater?"

Ryuuken just shook his head and took the first shirt available. They were all too big for him by now so it didn't matter.

His stomach cramped wildly with hunger and it didn't make it better with the smell of breakfast in the house.

Isshin must've noticed the ex directors discomfort for quickly ushered him back to the table and urged him to eat.

He sat down opposite of the hesitating Ryuuken and sat the example by eating the meal shameless fast and making approving sounds at the taste.

Ryuuken watched him for a couple of moments before beginning to eat himself. He found his hands shaking badly from the need of nicotine, but for the moment the food seemed more important. He had for a moment forgotten about his shoulder and had used the right hand for the fork. He had quickly revised that and was fumbling to eat with his left.

"So do you have any plans for the week?" Isshin tried aksing casually.

"Plans?"

"Yes, how do you plan to spend the time?" Ryuuken sighed and took another bite. Isshin was quite surprised at how much the thin man had eaten.

"I don't know," he finally answered and shrugged his shoulders. He began swallowing the pills and Isshin looked on, surprised at how many the other doctor could down in one gulp.

"May I make some suggestions then?" Isshin dared. Ryuuken shrugged his shoulders again.

"Sure."

"Go to the hospital today and get an x-ray of that shoulder," he took a gulp of the water, "- then you contact that house keeper of yours and make a deal with her about cooking. Tomorrow you start clearing out your wife's rooms."

He waited a bit for Ryuuken to react.

"I'll help you. You should give Uryuu the chance to pick out some things that like he would like to keep for remembering," he added.

"He won't come."

"I think he will for this," Isshin quickly dismissed, "- but in any case I'll warm him up to it, if he comes over to my house this evening.

Ryuuken put down the fork and leaned back, obviously quite full.

"Thanks," he mumbled and looked away.

"Anyways, I have to get going," Isshin said, standing up and put on his jacket, "-I have a clinic to tend to. I'll see you tomorrow."


	12. Chapter 12

**Withering 12**

Again Ryuuken was alone.

He lighted a cigarette and took a deep drag from it. He immediately coughed a little, but he was quite adapt to ignoring this. He contemplated Isshin suggestions for a while and found them quite reasonable. He need some new clothes as well, something that would fit him and perhaps something that wasn't a suit. It was a radical thought for Ryuuken. Maybe even jeans – he hadn't worn jeans after his wife's death and that was quite a while ago.

Energized by the substantial meal he dressed in the smallest of his suits, even though it was a black armani suit mostly for evening wear, and got out in his car. It wasn't until he sat in the driver's seat that he realized that he wouldn't be able to drive with one good arm.

Afraid that the small sense of purpose he had found today would vanish, he immediately called a cab.

He called his house keeper on the way and agreed on meeting in the afternoon. He felt quite productive and went on and bought nearly a whole new wardrobe that fit including jeans and t-shirts.

It wasn't until he stood in front of the impressive Kagura Hospital that he felt down. I felt very strange to come a see all his coworkers as a patient, but he supposed a bad shoulder wasn't the worst thing he could walk in with.

As he walked in to the reception desk, the girl tending, sprang up to greet him.

"Director," it flew out of her, "-sorry, Ishida-sama. What can I do for you?"

"Please relax, I'm here as a patient," Ryuuken tried replying as calmly as he could.

"Oh, are you alright?"

"Fine, just busted a shoulder. I just wanted to make sure that it's completely back in its socket and that it isn't broken."

"Sure, I'll just register you. I'll need your social security number."

Ryuuken handed her the card.

"And I have to ask you what happened," she continued quite embarrassed. Ryuuken realized that it was just as uncomfortable for her.

"I slipped and fell. I'm not exactly sure what I hit to dislocate the shoulder."

"Ok, left or right."

"Right."

"Thanks, you can take a seat in the waiting room," she smiled at him, "-you know where it is." He flashed a small smile at her and found a place to sit down. He could really use a smoke right about now.

He went back to the receptionist with a smile.

"You wouldn't happen to know how long I can expect to wait?" he asked her while producing a cigarette from his breast pocket.

"It shouldn't be more than half an hour," she answered and smiled back. However, the smile withered away quickly when she saw the cigarette, "-you know those are very bad for you."

He smirked and accidentally coughed while he turned away from her and headed towards the exit.

"I know," he said and kept coughing wetly. If only the damned cough would go away but he knew that it wouldn't – at least for another month or so.

The doctor was not one he had met before. He was quite young and tall as hell. Much to his annoyance, Ryuuken felt dwarfed.

"Ishida Ryuuken," he marveled at the familiar name and looked at Ryuuken with excitement. He bowed deeply and succeeded in making Ryuuken uncomfortable.

"I don't believe we've met officially," the young doctor continued, "My name is Keisuke Hirano and I just joined the hospital a little over a year ago."

"So you're an intern?" Ryuuken drawled unimpressed.

"Yes, I am," Keisuke beamed, "-I was quite worried when you quit your position after collapsing at that fund raiser, that something was seriously wrong with you."

Ryuuken had hoped to have some older doctor who cared more about propriety. He guessed he had no such luck today.

"No, there was just a difference in opinion."

"It must've have been a major one," Keisuke pried. Ryuuken said nothing..

"Look, I just need you to take an x-ray of my right shoulder," Ryuuken said overbearingly.

"Right, right," Keisuke immediately opened the his file, "- you fell?"

"Yes, and dislocated my shoulder," Ryuuken finished.

"Well, let's look at it. Take off your shirt." Ryuuken knew the order was coming, but he dreaded it. It was rather difficult unbuttoning the shirt with just one hand – and painfully slow. He was just glad that Heisuke let him take his time and didn't fuzz too much about him. Isshin would have done so.

The shoulder revealed itself, swollen and bruised and Keisuke focused his attention towards it.

"How did you get it back into place?" he asked and gently touched the joint.

"A friend of mine was over when it happened. He a doctor as well and he fixed it," he knew how absurd that sounded. It was near impossible to get a shoulder back into place without the patient being sedated. Even if one could, it was normally a 2 man job.

Perhaps due to Keisuke's inexperience he didn't question Ryuuken's explanation. Much to his relief, Keisuke was quite gentle when he moved the shoulder around, testing the joint. The shoulder was sore and stiff, but it was clear that Isshin had succeeded with getting it back into place.

"The shoulder seem fine, but as you said, we'll take an x-ray just to be safe," Keisuke concluded. However, he continued to look at Ryuuken with an examining look, "-have you always been this thin?"

There it was; the dreaded question. It was foolish of him to think that he could pass as healthy. He hardly could have missed the slight wheezing or his general poor appearance. Ryuuken tried concentrated on putting his shirt back on.

"I've always been thin, but I've lost a little weight due to a bout of pneumonia," Ryuuken explained, trying to sound convincing.

"You shouldn't lose that much weight, based on a simple case of pneumonia," Keisuke reasoned and met Ryuuken's gaze. Off course Ryuuken's doctor would be completely oblivious to the techniques of getting a shoulder back into place, but quite good with looking general health issues out. Ryuuken sighed..

"I do not want to undermine you as a doctor, but I'm quite well aware of this fact," Ryuuken began, trying his best not to walk all over the young doctor, "-however, I have been checked thoroughly. There's nothing wrong with me, except for the pneumonia."

Keisuke bowed his head.

"But you should really quit smoking," Keisuke then added and relished in the surprised look that Ryuuken gave him. Ryuuken's surprise was short lived though, when he came to think about it, it was quite easy to tell he was a smoker; the nicotine stained fingers and the smell – it was only minutes ago that he was outside smoking, which meant the smell would still be present.

"I know," Ryuuken resigned and offered no explanation or excuses.

"You know where x-ray are located in the second floor. I'll see you again, once it's been taken." Keisuke concluded, took a quick bow and left the room.

Ryuuken knew exactly where it was and how many people he could risk running into on the way there. He was suddenly put off by the idea. The chance of there actually being something wrong with the shoulder was unlikely now. It now seemed like he was crawling back to the hospital.

A minute later, he was outside the hospital, desperately trying to flag a cab. It looked like it was about to rain and he had no desire to get caught.

His stomach was beginning to hurt as well, he was getting hungry on top of it all. And he was getting tired. He had no idea why as he had slept for quite a long time last night.

In desperation he shouted after a cab driver that blatantly ignored him, but that only made him cough. Defeated he realized that he wasn't going to able to get one from the position he was in..

Coughing again, he began walking towards the general direction of his house, hoping to find someplace where he would have a greater chance of hailing a cab. Once the coughing started, it was very hard to stop again and with the walking he found himself badly winded and coughing for every other breath he took.

Feeling quite sorry for himself, he craved a cigarette, but decided against it; adding smoke to his current situation, would probably send him over the edge.

When a cab finally stopped for him, he was completely exhausted and his ribs were beginning to hurt from all the coughing.

He had hardly been in the cab for more than a couple of minutes before it began pouring down and he praised himself lucky.

His cell phone's ring tone suddenly filled the space. It was Isshin.

"Yes," Ryuuken answered the call tiredly.

"Hey, I convinced Uryuu," he exclaimed happily, "-We'll come by tomorrow."

This surprised Ryuuken more than anything. He couldn't help but to wonder just how Isshin had succeeded.

"Ryuuken?"

"Yes, erm... that's good. You can come by anytime you want."

"We were thinking around 10 o'clock?"

"It's fine"

"Good, I'll see you then."

**Author's note:**

Well, I can tell that everybody is waiting for Uryuu to really enter the story. So I better get to it!

Thanks for the reviews so far :) It's always nice to know that somebody's reading the story and willing to spend the time to throw the writer a bone! It's greatly appreciated!


	13. Chapter 13

**Withering 13**

Uryuu damned himself for the 3rd time for ever agreeing to this. It was clearly a mistake. He had no desire to spend this Saturday or even any other day in his father's company.

The only thing he was going to focus on today was his mother. It was for her sake. He wouldn't allow his father to erase all memories of her.

He didn't understand why Ryuuken suddenly decided it was time to clear out everything about his mother. It seemed disrespectful, but Isshin, who stood by his side, insisted that it was a good thing; that Ryuuken was finally addressing suppressed issues.

Uryuu couldn't quite understand that – how could you suppress that his mother had died. It had happened – that was evident for everyone.

"He doesn't handle grief well," Isshin tried to explain with patience and seemingly encouraged by the fact that Uryuu had asked as they were approaching the Ishida estate.

"Who does?" Uryuu countered, clearly getting more and more uncomfortable. Isshin chucked. How they were much more alike that they would ever admit.

"Indeed, who does?" It was such a sad subject that Isshin didn't care to explain further. He just hoped he had somehow prepared the boy enough as he had prepared his father.

The Ishida estate presented itself well even in the pouring rain. It was massive brick building, so very unlike Japanese estates.

It was more of a European styled house, maybe even German, but Uryuu wasn't quite sure – he had never been there. It was rich and luxurious and very big.

"Why would you want to move away from this?" Uryuu asked, having been used to a small dorm room for years.

"This house constantly reminds him that he's alone. You two are the lasts Quincies, he lost his wife in an early age and his son as well," Isshin sent Uryuu a very saying look, "- his father too. And you have to remember that he remembers a time where he was a part of an extremely large family – the Quincies, before the annihilation."

"He hated grandpa," Uryuu commented dryly.

"You're wrong," Isshin quickly shot back, "-they just disagreed on a couple of fundamental things. They got along quite nicely when they avoided certain subjects. You might not remember it."

"I suppose there were times that they didn't yell at each other," Uryuu sighed as Isshin rang the door bell. He didn't feel ready for this.

He was rather pleasantly surprised when the young house keeper opened the door and showed them in. Uryuu hadn't seen her before. She was a little older than him and it surprised him that she was just as tall.

"He'll be down in a moment," she announced.

"How's he feeling today, Mitsumi?" Isshin asked in a low volume. She looked up the stairs to make sure that he wasn't on the way down.

"It seems he's had a rough night," she whispered, "- looks like he's about to keel over and he's been coughing up a storm all morning."

Mitsumi disappeared into the kitchen again. Isshin smiled after her, she was such a nice girl, gentle and smiling. It was pity she was so young. Isshin turned his gaze towards Uryuu and noticed he was following her with his eyes as well. He guessed somebody didn't consider her age a drawback.

The sound of coughing announced Ryuuken's approach. Isshin found himself staring at the other doctor, who wasn't in his usual suit, but in a pair of jeans and a pale green shirt. And it fit him as well. However, that only emphasized how skinny he was – he made an incredible lean silhouette walking down the stairs.

"Sleep well?," Isshin dared.

"Hardly," Ryuuken groaned when he successfully got the coughing under control. Ryuuken's eyes looked bruised and he looked significantly older than yesterday – his wrinkles around his eyes seemed to have doubled over night. He gave Uryuu a short nod in recognition that he was there

"How's the shoulder?" Isshin continued to pry.

"Sore," Ryuuken quickly answered, clearly not wanting to elaborate, "-Shall we get to it?"

Even though it had been so many years, the death of Uryuu's mother was still not something one talked about. Isshin thought that was partly why Uryuu and Ryuuken never spoke – they reminded each other of what had happened.

The rooms upstairs that held his mother's remaining earthly possessions were dark and dusty. The air in them were strangely thick with neglect and memories. Uryuu and Ryuuken both stood outside and looked in with hesitation.

Isshin decided to take action and straightened himself up.

"Let's get some light to work in for starters," he announced as he entered and yanked the heavy curtains aside allowing the scarce sun light to fill the room. The weather outside reflected the mood of the room.

The sudden movement in the air whirled the dust around and immediately sent Ryuuken coughing desperately. Uryuu looked intently at the sick man and took in the sound and the sight and marveled at how different Ryuuken seemed physically to the Ryuuken he had known when he had lived here. The last 3 years hadn't been kind to him.

Isshin cursed himself for not thinking about the dust. He shouldn't have made Ryuuken do this so soon. His lungs needed rest – not to get agitated further. He opened the window as far as it could and let the fresh humid air in.

"I'll go and open the window in the other room as well," Isshin said and patted Ryuuken a couple of times on the back as he passed him.

"Good idea," Ryuuken choked out and continue coughing behind a closed mouth. Uryuu forced his eyes of Ryuuken and looked at the mountain of boxes and he suddenly realized that he hadn't any idea of what they were going to find in them. He hardly remembered anything.

He quietly watched as Ryuuken finally mustered enough courage to go forth and opened the first box. Uryuu straightened himself and stood on his toes to see what he found. He saw Ryuuken visibly letting a breath he was holding go. It was just clothes. Just clothes.

"We'll give this to charity," Ryuuken announced and lifted the box into the hall. Uryuu sighed deeply and opened the next box. Finding clothes had somehow taking the edge of the situation. This new box was an expensive looking one, shining and black.

This revealed more clothes, but as he investigated further, he found that it was his mother's western styled wedding dress, thoroughly wrapped in plastic. He looked over his shoulder to see what Ryuuken was doing. Luckily he was otherwise occupied with a necklace he'd found on her old desk .

Uryuu hardly dared to breathe as he uncovered the dress. He gently let his fingers run over the smooth expensive bright white silk and lace. How she must've felt when she wore this. He looked at Ryuuken again. Why she'd ever picked him was beyond him, he thought with a smile.

Uryuu cowered when the Ryuuken again erupted in a fit of coughing. The gray haired man was hunched over, his left hand clutching his chest and his eyes were shut as he grimaced in evident pain.

Isshin entered the room again, his eyes weighing heavily on Ryuuken. The cough was thick and phlegm filled. It sounded almost hollow.

"That doesn't sound too good," Isshin said with undisguised worry in his voice. Ryuuken just shook his head and continued coughing helplessly, "-have you kept to your meds?"

Ryuuken struggled to stop the spasms, but it looked as if he couldn't take a single slow breath without triggering another cough.

"Let's get you out of here for a moment," Isshin decided and took the choking Ryuuken by the arm and hauled him out. Uryuu's gaze lingered after them. He had little interest in following them, even though he was curious as to how sick Ryuuken really was. He turned his attention towards the wedding dress again and it hit him that he could lose his father as well.

Ryuuken willed himself to stop as Isshin pulled him down stairs. He was short breathed and his chest sounded as if it was bubbling.

"Have you kept to your meds?" Isshin repeated.

"Yes," Ryuuken answered breathlessly with pained look on his face.

"And you haven't felt an improvement?"

"Sure I have," Ryuuken tried answering nonchalantly, but the effect was diminished by the fact that he had to breathe in between every second word, "-I just haven't slept very well. That is, I can't sleep because of the cough."

Isshin looked increasingly worried.

"It's only natural for the lungs to start clearing out," Ryuuken argued.

"How much have you been smoking?" Isshin cut him short.

"Hardly at all," Ryuuken answered with a sigh, "-please don't remind me."

"We did catch it pretty late."

"By the Gods, Isshin," Ryuuken rolled his eyes, "-I'm 43 – not 63. It's highly unlikely that there will be any complications. I'm still standing. Many people are bed ridden with pneumonia, so I actually think I'm doing pretty well."

Isshin looked him in the eyes, the fire in them burning vividly for a moment. Then Ryuuken seemed to lose his strength again and sat down on the stairs.

"I'm just so damned tired."

"Well, you should spend more time in bed," Isshin said gently and he sat down besides Ryuuken.

"Have you any idea of how much I cough when I lie down?," Ryuuken added as buried his eyes in his palms.

"Try some pain killers. They ought to help you relax a bit and even make it possible for you to breathe deeper," Isshin suggested.

"I know. They just don't help that much."

Isshin patted him a couple on his back.

"Come up when you feel for it," Isshin stood up, "-we won't throw anything out that you haven't approved of."

Uryuu couldn't bring himself to let Ryuuken throw the dress out. It was a beautiful piece of craftsmanship and it represented a happy time of his mother's life. Even if it the whole dress couldn't be used, he thought it very romantic if his future wife wore a part of his mothers dress.

He wanted to keep it. However, he didn't like tell Ryuuken why he wanted to keep it.

"What have you found?," sounded Isshin cheerful voice suddenly behind him. Uryuu started and turned around.

"Her, her wedding dress," he stuttered. Isshin looked at it with a warm smile on his face.

"She looked like a goddess that day."

"Yes, I've seen the photos," Uryuu whispered. He oddly didn't like to look at them because Ryuuken was in them as well. However, that notion seemed to go against all self preservation instincts in him. If she hadn't married Ryuuken, he would never have been born. It was a strange thought to owe his life to a man that he disliked.

Harsh wet coughing could be heard from downstairs again.

"It's strange that he has let it come this far," Uryuu mused.

"He's used to living an unhealthy life style," Isshin commented neutrally, glad that Uryuu was taking some kind of interest..

"But he should know better."

Isshin gave a half crooked smile.

"Why?" he challenged.

"Well, he is a doctor after all…"

"He is also just human. He spends all day looking after other people's need, but when he comes home there is nobody to tell him to relax and that he's an idiot - quit smoking."

"He is a grown man. He doesn't need anyone to tell him that."

"He has nothing to live for," Isshin cut him off, "-don't you see that he has nothing to come home to. His wife died, his son avoids him. He has nothing but his work and he quit that this week. He has nothing."

Uryuu closed the box again and lifted it out in the hallway, carefully avoiding Isshin's gaze as he took in this new light on Ryuuken.

He supposed he was right, if Ryuuken felt as alone as he himself did often. He had been mingling with the shinigami now for lack of better company even deep down he knew it was wrong. They betrayed his kind, his family and had left him with just one family member. He knew how lonely the dark evenings could be.

But he usually kept himself busy with studying or spending some time with Orihime. At least she wasn't shinigami. She had lost her parents too.

Not too. Uryuu had only lost his mother. He had at least stayed in his own house he had been used to and with another human being he had been used to.

He supposed that Isshin to some extent was right. Ryuuken didn't have much besides work.

"Did he really quit as director?"

"Yes, I don't know if you saw it in the papers, but he collapsed at a fund raiser party last weekend. After that the board wanted more control over his position," Isshin smirked, "-he wouldn't allow that, so he quit."

Uryuu stared at him almost disbelievingly. His father had been really sick - was really sick.

His father…

It had been many years since he had used that word about Ryuuken. He absentmindedly fiddled with the edge of another box, just an ordinary card boar box. He suddenly felt cold.

Ryuuken had quit his job, clearing up in his wife's possessions and planning to move. He was even reaching out towards Uryuu.

"Is he dying?" Uryuu asked in an insecure voice.

"We are all dying," Isshin answered neutrally, then sighed heavily, "- it's probably not that bad. It's just that he looks a little worse than he did yesterday. However, it's just pneumonia and we checked for cancer in the lungs and found nothing."

"Why did you look for cancer?"

"Repeating bouts of pneumonia, weight loss, and fatigue could all be symptoms of lungs cancer, especially in smokers."

"Has he lost weight?"

Isshin gave him a confused look. Uryuu just wanted another to confirm it for him. He was not sure whether or not it'd just been himself that had grown. After all he had grown about 5 centimeters over the last year.

"You can't tell? He's about your size now… which isn't good for a grown man of his height."

"But why hasn't he quit the cigarettes?" Uryuu exclaimed. He couldn't get in his head that his father, driven by logic, wouldn't quit smoking.

"It's one of his few vices," Isshin shrugged, "-don't get me wrong – he needs to quit. But it's just one of his weaknesses. He is actually quite embarrassed by the fact that he can't quite. He knows it signals lack of character strength."

"He's embarrassed?" Uryuu didn't know what to think anymore. He sat down in resignation.

"You couldn't find anything more interesting to talk about than me?"

Ryuuken suddenly stood in the door way, his eyes resting heavily on Isshin, who in return smiled apologetically .

"But you're such a good subject," Isshin argued goofily. Ryuuken shook his head and rolled his eyes in obvious annoyance. Then he noticed the shiny black box in the hall way.

"What have you found here?" his eyes suddenly filled with curiosity instead. Uryuu stood up with a start.

"It's her wedding dress," he answered stoically. Ryuuken faltered and kept staring at the significant box. Then he kneeled and took the top off. He seemed just as interested in the dress as Uryuu had been and gently touched the fabric.

He then cleared his throat and put the top back on.

"I suppose we could give it to charity as well."

"Actually, I would like to keep it," Uryuu finally dared. That earned him a surprised look from Ryuuken.

"Why?" He asked with evident puzzlement. Uryuu's eyes grew frantic.

"Well," he started, "-I plan to get married one day." This didn't exactly help Ryuuken's puzzlement, but he somehow accepted it.

"Ok," he said with a nod. Uryuu couldn't believe how mellow he was. Who was this man? And where was Ryuuken?

Ryuuken must've have seen Uryuu's confused look.

"Well, it would be rather twisted for me to use the dress again if I ever were to marry again. It's much more acceptable to wear something that belonged to one of the parties' parent," Ryuuken tried to explain. It actually succeeded in making Uryuu more comfortable. The Ryuuken driven by logic wasn't completely gone. "-not, that I'm ever going to marry anyone again," he added looked away.

His father marrying again had never even crossed his mind. He guessed that somewhere in his mind he still thought him devoted to his mother

But Uryuu suspected that it could happen again. His father wasn't that old, even though he didn't look too good at the moment. He was rich enough to be a good catch and that meant there would always be someone that would marry him.

He turned his gaze towards Isshin. Why hadn't he found someone new? He wasn't socially callous like Ryuuken and at times he was even funny. He considered it for a moment and gathered that it was probably hard to find the time with kids and a clinic or a 100 hours a week director's job.

The day went on relatively uneventful. Isshin considered it very much a success – no one had been killed and they had acted rather civilized towards one another. And even better – Uryuu agreed to come again the next day to finish the job even though he wasn't going to be there. That meant Uryuu and Ryuuken alone together for a longer period of time. Truth be told he was very apprehensive

As the day had progressed he could tell that Ryuuken was getting quite tired. The way he had carried himself mid afternoon wasn't very impressive or imposing. His thin shoulders were slumped and his back not quite straight. He leaned against everything he could find that would take his weight in order to relieve his exhausted body. When his eye lids had begun drooping he had decided that they would have to call it a day.

"Get something to eat, take your meds, and go to sleep," Isshin preached all the way out with little variation, driving Ryuuken insane.

"You should mind your own business," Ryuuken answered flatly. His energy was completely depleted.


	14. Chapter 14

**Withering 14**

As soon as they were gone, he couldn't help but light a cigarette. It was only his 6th cigarette today and that was quite a milestone. He expected to be able to keep his smoking to less than 10 today.

But there was a very natural explanation; he couldn't smoke without coughing today. At all. He tried spiting his lungs into submission, but they seemed to just rebel against him harder.

This was how Mitsumi found him when she returned to the house to make dinner.

"Are you alright, Ishida-sama," she asked tentatively as she took her jacket off. Ryuuken just nodded and placed the cigarette on his lips again. Apparently she hadn't noticed that he was smoking at first because her facial expression changed dramatically when she realized it.

"I know it's not my place," Mitsumi began, but was cut short by Ryuuken's cough as he inhaled off the cigarette, "- but sometimes you don't seemed very interested in getting better," she continued when Ryuuken again was quiet.

That was the hardest thing he had ever heard her say. She was normally very shy of conflict so it surprised him.

"You think I like coughing like this?" he asked her, maybe a little sharper than he intended. He hadn't gotten used to this heavy smoker's voice he was currently sporting

"Off course not," she immediately retreated, "-it's just that you keep punishing your body like this. I don't understand."

He sighed and coughed a couple of times more, then abandoned the idea of finishing the cigarette and put it out.

"May I add, how much I have cut back on the smoking," Ryuuken added tiredly, feeling very much underappreciated, "-I used to smoke 40 a day and I'm down to 10 now."

"Really? You smoked that much?" Mitsumi looked like she couldn't comprehend it. Ryuuken just nodded. He hadn't thought it that much, until he got sick and everyone gave him the same reaction. It was just a habit that crept up on him slowly so that he didn't notice how all consuming it became.

"I know I need to quit," Ryuuken added in a softer voice, "-I'm working on it." Mitsumi smiled.

"Good, I would hate to see you even sicker," she chanted in a happy tone and practically skipped out to the kitchen, her jet black pony tail whipping after her. Had she been anyone else Ryuuken would have made some crude remark, but he let it slide. It was just that everyone was fussing over him and it was getting on his nerves. He forced himself to believe that she was just considerate by nature and she didn't say it to annoy him. With Isshin it would have been different.

As she began cooking, even though the whole house smelled lovely, he could hardly keep himself awake. The day's events were weighing heavily on him. He sat down by the dinner table and it wasn't long before he lay his head on the table and fell asleep.

He woke again with a start when Mitsumi placed the plate besides him. His glasses fell off in the process. Apparently his reaction startled Mitsumi as well whom quickly took a step back.

"Oh, Ishida-sama, I'm sorry," she immediately apologized, "-I didn't think you were actually sleeping."

Ryuuken was fumbling to reach his glasses, but he was quite blind without them, plus the added effect of the blood rushing away from his brain due to his rapid movement, didn't quite help.

"Is it getting dark in here, or is it just my eye sight that's getting worse," Ryuuken asked as he finally managed to get a hold of the glasses that were lying on the middle of the table.

"It's quite dark," Mitsumi reassured him, "-it looks as though a massive thunder storm is coming in."

"Really?" Ryuuken feigned interest and tried straightening the glasses that had bend during his little nap. As soon as he put them back on, he saw what she meant; big angry clouds, almost black, were just swarming over the horizon. The wind had picked up as well.

"That looks quite serious," he found himself suddenly standing up, "-have you heard anything?"

"No, but I haven't had much of a chance watching TV this week," Mitsumi answered, her voice sounding a bit insecure after sensing his seriousness.

Ryuuken resolutely found the remote control and turned on the TV, zapped a couple of times before finding a channel with the news on it.

"We'll have to wait until the weather comes on," he concluded, "-do you have any plans tonight?"

The young woman looked like a deer caught in the head light.

"Nothing besides studying," she answered a little apprehensively.

"Why don't you eat here, I'm sure that you've made enough for the both of us," Ryuuken suggested and looked out the window, "-then maybe, if you're lucky, this will have passed."

"Oh," she smiled, "-okay. That would be very nice. Thank you."

He put a dismissive hand between them and followed her out into the kitchen. As she plated for herself, he began the task of producing all the pills he was supposed to take with his evening meal. It took a while.

"What would you like to drink?" he asked politely.

"Water, thank you," she smiled and he studied her closely for a couple of seconds. He was wondering if she chose water because it was best for him. He found no sign of ulterior motives and gave a ghost of a smile back.

"I should probably drink water as well."

"If you are to swallow all of those," she gestured his handful of pills, "- then it's probably be a good idea."

Just then the weather forecast came on the news. They immediately warned about a seriously powerful thunder storm rolling over their part of the country with significant wind forces.

"Looks like we are about to rain away," Ryuuken commented dryly, "-You are on bike aren't you?"

"Yes, I am," she sighed heavily and sat down at the dinner table opposite of where Ryuuken's plate was placed.

"Have you brought your school work?"

"I have."

"Then please consider using one of the guest rooms," Ryuuken offered as he sat down in front of her. He tried not to look at her as he was quite unsure of how she would take it. He didn't want to come off as some kind of pervert, "-I won't bother you. I'm going to bed as soon as we've eaten."

When he met her eyes again she was smiling.

"Thank you, Ishida-sama," she beamed, "-that's so sweet of you. But let's see how bad it gets."

Ryuuken didn't quite know what to do with himself.

She had made a spicy fish soup with noodles and it smelled wonderful. He tried concentrating on eating and not looking at her. He had to pull himself together, he was a grown man and she was a grown woman, even though she was still quite young.

He buried his eyes in his palm. Why was he thinking like that? He had just offered her a place to stay. It was not like he was going to pose any threat to her anyway. Oh God, it was not even like he was going to make a move. He thanked the gods that Isshin couldn't hear his thoughts.

"Are you alright, Ishida-sama?" She asked carefully. He removed his palm and met her gaze.

"I'm fine… just tired," he answered mildly and returned his attention towards the soup, "-this tastes rather nice."

She immediately flashed one of her blinding smiles, one that seemed almost too big for her face.

"Thank you, it's my mother's recipe."

Ryuuken took a relatively deep breath.

"So I understand that you have taken this job to support yourself through college?" he asked, trying to sound a little detached.

"Yes, my family isn't too rich, so if I wanted to go to university, then I had to pay for myself.

"It must be hard. You spend a lot of time here so when do you find time to study?"

"In the evenings, but I'm a fast reader so I manage."

Ryuuken nodded approvingly.

"What is it that you are studying?"

"Anthropology."

"Oh?" Ryuuken was quite surprised. He had expected veterinarian nurse or something like that. She seemed like the type that would flail at the sight of a bunny. He supposed he had it wrong.

"Yes, I find it fascinating how societies work," she commented without looking up from her soup. Ryuuken's stomach still wasn't used a lot of food and he had to give up, but he had managed more than half the bowl.

Just then the room flashed bright white as a lightning lit the world outside. Almost simultaneously the rain intensified to the point where it was possible to drown if one went out. Ryuuken could tell that it was going to be a long night already.

"I should go out and check that everything is secured good enough," Ryuuken got up slowly, keeping his right arm bent and close to his torso in order to support it.

"Should you really be out in this weather?"

"No, I shouldn't," he blankly admitted, "-but it's no use if something flies through the window during the night."

"I could go out and check for you?" Mitsumi offered a little hesitantly. Ryuuken offered her a quick smile.

"I'm not sure that you know what to look for, but thank you." He was just about to pick up his bowl, when she stood up with a start.

"Let me take that," she said a little too eagerly as if she was embarrassed. He quickly disappeared into the kitchen. He wasn't even sure that she had finished eating. He decided not to care and just as he turned around to go out and find a rain cloak, he moved his upper body. He could almost hear the puss in his chest crackling and the cough overtook him with force. For a moment the puss completely blocked his wind pipe and his eyes widened in panic. The stumbled out to the nearest bathroom and continued coughing without really being able to breathe in again. He coughed until he had no more air in his lungs and then with small heaving extremely labored breaths he regained a little air to work with.

"Ishida-sama, should I call Kurasaki-sama?" Ryuuken hadn't even noticed she had come up beside him. He couldn't talk, he just shook his head.

Another coughing fit hit him, but at least it cleared his lungs a bit when it was over. He could breathe a little easier. However, his chest was still tight and aching and his breath wheezed loudly. His face was covered with a sheen of sweat and didn't quite want to admit it, but he was shaking with adrenaline that had been pumped through his system. He had felt the panic gripping him just for a second. It was a good thing that he was quitting the cigarettes – he did not want to get old and die feeling like that all of the time.

Mitsumi, he noted, was still standing in the door way to the bathroom. Ryuuken wanted to assure her, but he didn't quite trust his own strength enough to let go of the sink, he was leaning on.

"I'm sure it doesn't sound like it, but that was a good thing," Ryuuken began panting as he spoke, "- the puss needs to be cleared out before I can get better." He shot a sideways glance at her. She didn't look convinced.

"I'm going to prepare sleeping arrangement in the guest room next door for you," she announced in a serious voice.

"No, you won't be able to sleep with me coughing in the next room." Ryuuken tried following her. Even though his legs could support him, he knew that he couldn't keep up with her.

"You shouldn't be alone when you're coughing like that. You could choke for real," she sounded downright angry. Ryuuken didn't understand and stopped dead in his tracks.

"What…?" he tried, but couldn't finish as she turned around and he saw tears in her eyes.

it's just… painful to watch," she seemingly tried to explain, but Ryuuken didn't find her too coherent.

"I'm sorry." He wasn't sure why he said that, but he didn't like to see the girl cry.

"No, I'm sorry," she sniffed, "- it's just that my grandfather died of lung cancer. I won't have anyone else going like that."

"It's not lung cancer," Ryuuken was getting annoyed by this assumption, "-it's just pneumonia."

"I know. It just reminds me of that time," she sank down in a chair, "- but it doesn't change the fact that you shouldn't be alone. You could choke even if it's only pneumonia."

"And would you be able to do if I did?" Ryuuken countered, "-CPR wouldn't help in that situation."

"I could call for help," she offered. Ryuuken was on the verge of saying that so could he, but he supposed she was right; if he really was choking, then he wouldn't be able to speak, let alone call for help.

"I'll make a bed for you," she took his silence as him accepting the situation. Ryuuken sighed and went out and found his long rain cloak.

Once outside the humidity hit him like a sledge hammer.

The cough set in instantaneously after that. He simply didn't have the strength to keep coughing like this, it had to end.

Coughing and choking he checked the doors and hinges of the garage and the other buildings connected to the estate. Some of them were getting quite old and rusty. He wouldn't be surprised if the thing gave out during the night. The rain poured down and was sent almost vertically by the strong wind gusts. The lighting was getting more frequent and the thunder was coming closer. He surely couldn't have postponed this anymore than he already had. He secured the thing as well as he could and stumbled towards the house again, when the electricity suddenly disappeared simultaneously with lightning struck not too far away. The roar of the thunder was ear deafening and now he found himself in the garden in complete darkness. His eye sight was complete thrown off by the lightning so he couldn't see a thing. His glasses were of little use when covered in rain drops.

He had an idea of the general direction, but it was getting difficult to orientate himself as the rain began falling even harder.

He found the wall of the main building and followed it around until he found the back door.

Closing the door behind made him realize how noisy it had been outside. However, it was just as dark inside now.

"Mitsumi!" he called out and regretted it a second later when the cough attacked him again. A metallic taste hit the back of his throat, but he couldn't will the cough down.

"Yes," he heard her say. She must've been at the end of the hall by the sound of it. He kept coughing until he practically stopped breathing. Not being able to navigate and not having a handkerchief on his body, left him no other choice but to cough into his sleeve.

Slowly, painfully so, the cough abated and allowed Ryuuken to get some much needed oxygen in his system again.

"Do you think you can find some candles?" he asked the room in an abused voice.

"I have already found some. I just can't find a lighter," Ryuuken smirked.

"I have a lighter here." He adeptly produced it from his pocket.

"I thought you might." He could tell by her voice that she was smiling. Following the wall they found each other.

"Show me where, I can't see a bloody thing," Ryuuken whispered and reached out his hand, which she gently took and ushered up to where she was holding the candle holder. Feeling his way, he found the top and lit it. At first it blinded them both. He continued lighting the two others.

"Your hands are shaking," she noticed. Ryuuken smirked.

"Yes, my body is craving a smoke," he explained and packed the lighter away again. With a bit of light in the room it was now evident that his glasses were steamed up from being out in the rain. He tried cleaning by wiping them with his shirt, but they quickly steamed up again due to his hair being so wet.

"Did you manage to prepare the rooms before the electricity was cut off?" He asked and just gave up with the glasses.

"Not quite.. I still need a couple of pillows," she started and looked up at him again, "- and if I could borrow a t-shirt to sleep in, that would be very nice."

"Sure, take whatever you can find. Do we have any more candles?"

"Yes, I put them on the coffee table. I'll go up stairs and see if I can find what we need."

"Okay, be careful."

Ryuuken waited until she had gone up the stairs before igniting the lighter and slowly making his way into the living room. He didn't want anyone to know how blind he really was in the dark, but truth be told, he had to feel his way to the coffee table. There he found about 10 thick candle stick that could stand on their own. For a second he wondered how these had gotten into the house, but he gathered it was Mitsumi that had bought them when she went shopping for him.

Lighting all them brought enough light into the room for him to see relatively normal again.

Again the blinding light ripped through the room 3 times in a row, followed by another ear deafening roar that seemed to last forever. Ryuuken sighed, it was definitely going to be a long night. Coughing again, he let himself sink into the couch. He was getting too tired and the cough wasn't as productive as it had been earlier, it were reduced to half hearted spasms that haunted his diaphragm.

The metallic taste hit him his tongue again and he felt his heart drop. Apprehensively he dapped his lips again his sleeve and watched as they left a dark smear.

He groaned in annoyance as he realized that he was bleeding again. He produced his cell phone from his pocket and was just about to speed dial Isshin, when he abandoned the idea again.

Isshin could do nothing. It wasn't a dangerous bleed and it wasn't all that uncommon during a bad bout of pneumonia. Breathing slowly and trying not to agitate his lungs further, he deeply regretted leaving Isshin's place that evening. Manipulating spirit particles in this condition had not been one of his brighter ideas and it was clear that it had set his recovery back by at least a couple of weeks.

And he didn't want to worry Isshin more than he had to. He had been rather surprised with Isshin behavior towards him today. He was treating him like a china doll, which was very atypical for Isshin and he was spending so was time away from his clinic that Ryuuken was feeling guilty.

He would have to make it up to him when he was feeling better.

He looked around the room bathed in candle light and he found himself feeling satisfied that he had made the decision to move away. There were nothing but bitter sweet memories left in this house.

The distinctive aura of a hollow suddenly appeared on the edge of Ryuuken's awareness. It had appeared in the old part of town. Ryuuken sighed loudly, it was such a noisy being – everything about it roared. It was followed by spirit particles being manipulated in a sloppy Quincy style. Uryuu was really badly trained, but Ryuuken supposed he was getting too old to really learn much new. In spite of the sloppy manipulation the aura of the hollow died down again, leaving his world quiet again.

The energy he had regained after the meal seemed to vanish again as quickly as it had bestowed.

In what seemed like the next second, Mitsumi was shaking his shoulder and his mind was clouded, sluggish. It was her continued urgency that finally pulled him to the surface.

"Ishida-sama, wake up. The bed is ready, come on," she continued chanting as she carefully shook his left shoulder. She had praised them both lucky that she had remembered that he had injured his right.

When he opened his eyes, but still wasn't reacting, she took his hand and stood up and pulled, urging him to stand up.

She had never imagined that he would be able to fall so deeply asleep so quickly, but somehow he had managed it.

He followed her about as animate as a zombie.

"I took the night clothes that was lying on your bed. I hope they're alright," she explained as lead the way in the gleam of the candle light. He grunted something in return, which she took as him accepting it.

She had made sure to make the bed with a ton of pillows in order to elevate his chest so that he might get some undisturbed sleep. She doubted she had ever seen a grown man so tired as Ryuuken was.

She left the guest room after having repeatedly told him to change his clothes. When he began unbuttoning his shirt, she took it as her cue to leave. She would check on him again in about 15 minutes, the man was after all practically sleep walking.

A quarter to seven she found the book she had brought with her. Making herself comfortable in the couch, she smiled as she realized that she had about 2 more hours for studying than she had anticipated. Even though the thundering made her start every time, she couldn't help but feeling like it was quite cozy with the candle lights and pillows and somehow felt safe with the knowledge that Ryuuken was in the next room.

Ryuuken had slept significantly better than he had done in a long time. It wasn't that he was completely rested, but it surely was an improvement and after a long hot shower he felt almost like human being again. That was until he had the first severe coughing fit of the day that still revealed blood in the sputum.

He sighed deeply and dutifully went down and swallowed his antibiotics and tried eating breakfast, but he had to admit that the pills were beginning to affect his stomach. He felt nauseas.

Mitsumi noticed that he was picking at his food.

"You know, Uryuu will be here in a moment," she began slowly and gestured his plate, "-you should finish that."

"I know," he answered flatly and gathered courage. He then dispassionately emptied the plate in large gulps and tried willing his stomach to settle down.

"Didn't you like it?" Mitsumi sounded a little hurt. Ryuuken sighed as he got up, still trying to stabilize his right arm against his body.

"It was fine. I'm just not that hungry." He placed this left hand on the sore shoulder and tried moving it around, but it seemed just as angry and sore as it had been yesterday. He knew it needed rest. Just then he realized that he had to have an old sling lying about from the last time he dislocated it.

With a determined look on his face he left a little disheartened Mitsumi in the kitchen and began rummaging through his bedroom closets.

The sling was in perfect condition, black and made in a heavy nylon fabric. He placed the strap on his left shoulder and cradled his right arm in the sling. It fit perfectly. Just relieving the injury of the weight of the arm brought immediate relief.

He sat down on the bed and enjoyed a moment for himself. He looked at the sling again, furrowing his brow. The only problem was that it made him look sick.

- I hope that you like :) 


	15. Chapter 15

**Withering 15**

The sling was also the first thing Uryuu noticed, but Ryuuken supposed that he couldn't blame him, as he didn't wear it yesterday.

"What happened to you?"

"I dislocated my shoulder Thursday. I just remembered that I had a sling this morning," Ryuuken tried to explain, leading the way to his wife's rooms.

"How?" Uryuu asked understandably puzzled, how his father that normally wasn't very physically active could get a standard sport injury. Ryuuken cursed himself behind closed eyes; he had really made some indiscretions lately.

"I fell," he answered curtly. Uryuu quickly sensed that he shouldn't asked any further. It suddenly itched in him to provoke, but he calmed himself.

"We should probably carry some of these things down to the garage so that I may take it to charity tomorrow," Ryuuken then argued, trying to deflect.

"Sure," Uryuu agreed and shrugged his shoulders, "-can you climb the flight of stairs repeatedly? I mean, with the pneumonia."

Ryuuken wanted to tell him to shut up, but sighed deeply instead.

"No, I suppose can't."

Uryuu looked more pale than usual, Ryuuken noticed. There was also something in the way he carried himself that was off. The forcibly removed his gaze from Uryuu and continued examining the drawers he was working on sorting out. He sincerely hoped that he hadn't caught the illness that he himself had succumb to.

Suddenly he sensed a whiff of blood in the air. It was probably his own breath and he excused himself and left the room a bit more dramatic than he would've liked. There was no need to worry everybody even further – it would pass soon enough.

In the bathroom he rinsed his mouth, but found that the smell had vanished again. He tried coughing a couple of times, but accidentally set off a real fit. Spitting the sputum into the sink, he found that his lungs were indeed still bleeding, but it wasn't as bad as he thought. Actually, it was nowhere near enough to have given up that strong odour. He suddenly remembered the hollow last night.

With decisive steps to went back into his wife's room where Uryuu still resided.

"Are you hurt?" he asked his son directly.

It was a pair of surprised eyes that met his.

"How?" Uryuu stammered and stood up, clearly favoring his left side.

"You fought a hollow last night," Ryuuken answered, keeping the eye contact, "-and you smell of blood."

Ryuuken might have exaggerated on the smell specifically coming from him, but he calculated that it would have a better impact on him. Uryuu almost flinched at the hard cold facts that Ryuuken listed up. He took his eyes away from Ryuukens' again. He must've been a fool to think he could list something like that past him. He never could in the past and even though Ryuuken was sick, it was evident that his mind was clear enough.

"How bad is it?" Ryuuken asked in a lower tone of voice that made him sound almost concerned. Uryuu couldn't help but feeling the déjà vu from back when he was a child and he had scraped his knee.

"It's just a graze," Uryuu finally answered after a pregnant pause, and gently put his hand over his left side, just a tad lower than his heart. Ryuuken felt his heart drop, but tried not to let it show; he didn't want to risk Uryuu suddenly turning away from him.

"Have you had it looked at?" he ventured. Uryuu just shook his head, obviously not liking the situation. Ryuuken sighed.

"Could I have a look at it?" he suggested and that earned him a examining look from Uryuu. Again the boy was a long time answering.

"Sure."

Ryuuken didn't know quite how to take it. Uryuu didn't flinch, didn't react, but at least he was going to let him take a look. At least he hadn't run away.

"Let my just get a pair gloves and a surgical mask."

"It's just a graze, not an operation," Uryuu commented after him.

"I'm sick, Uryuu," he answered tiredly with a strange tone of voice and it looked like it almost hurt him to say it out loud, "-I wouldn't want to infect the wound."

On his way back to Uryuu he lapsed into another fit of coughing that almost stole his breath away. It hurt so much to cough by now that his legs threatened to give out with every spasm. He dropped his medical bag and coughed into his left hand, cursing his useless right one.

Breathlessly he went passed the bathroom and washed his hands dutifully once the cough died down again.

"Where do you want to do this?" Uryuu asked when Ryuuken returned. He was trying to control the situation a bit, but he wasn't succeeding in his own mind at all.

"In the sitting room up here," Ryuuken answered and led the way, "- there should be enough light to work in."

He found a chair for himself and carefully dismounted the sling. The gloves went on easily enough, but once he came to the mask, re realized that he would never get his shoulder up to that point. Uryuu must've have seen him stop dead in his track.

"Let me help you," he offered and took the strings once Ryuuken had placed the mask his nose and tied them for him. He had seen both Isshin and Ryuuken do it a million times before. Ryuuken had to admit that he didn't know what to do with himself again. He absolutely hated being thrown out in these situations, but he supposed that Uryuu was feeling the same way.

Placing himself on the chair he signed Uryuu to come closer.

"Could you stand, while I'm doing this?"

"Of course," he scoffed. Ryuuken shot him a very saying look. He didn't appreciate that tone.

"Lift up your shirt," he directed. Uryuu did so and looked away, revealing a large bandage that was poorly made. It was almost saturated with blood.

Ryuuken lined up gauge and absorbent material before starting to the removed the bandage. It was fastened with sports tape and even regular paper tape, clearly it was made up of what was a hand.

"This is not good enough for a wound like this."

"It was what I had," Uryuu replied sharply.

Ryuuken loosened the bandage he uncovered a large deep cut that still was oozing blood. It grazed his lowest left rib and went around the side. As gently as he could, he examined how deep the wound really was. Over the rib it was quite superficial, but further out it was deep, quite deep actually. Uryuu tried shying away from his touch – it was no doubt painful.

"This needs stitches, Uryuu."

Ryuuken gave Uryuu a very saying look, "-you should take better care of this sort of thing. It could easily fester."

"Orihime could take care of this in a heartbeat," Uryuu answered tiredly.

"Orihime might not always be available." Ryuuken reasoned, trying to keep his voice in check, "-if I remember correctly she was the one that was kidnapped by Aizen."

Uryuu rolled his eyes. He hated when Ryuuken was right.

"Can you fix it?" he asked and hoped that Ryuuken would drop the lecturing. Even though he found it kinda funny how he was lecturing him about health, when he himself could hardly breathe from smoking and pneumonia.

Ryuuken sighed heavily and coughed a couple of times behind a closed mouth.

"I have the equipment, but I'm afraid that my shoulder isn't cooperating."

"So you can't?"

Ryuuken didn't quite know how much movement his shoulder would allow him. Uryuu probably wouldn't go to his own physician afterwards and explaining such an injury would be hard. They could call for Isshin, but he would rather not disturb him today. He had exploited him enough for this week.

He focused his attention on his right hand and arm and slowly tried to mimic the movement of stitching. He winced a couple of times when he hit points that jarred his shoulder.

His hand and elbow movements were completely fine, the problem came when he had to engage his shoulder. Even the slightest lifting motion pierced pain through his shoulder, even half way into his chest.

"I suppose I could if we place you in the right altitude where I won't have to move the shoulder in order to reach the wound."

"Okay, where?" Uryuu continued. He just to get this over with – he hated being stitched up.

"I don't suppose you can stand up while I'm doing it?" Ryuuken asked with a smirk and stood up. Uryuu looked at him with surprise evident in his eyes.

"No, I…" Uryuu began and Ryuuken put a dismissive hand between them.

"I was joking," he began and then coughed lightly, mostly to deflect the attention, "- I was thinking you could lie on the table."

Under the procedure Ryuuken kept the cough at a minimum, but he felt his chest getting tighter and tighter. The wound had taken longer to rinse and prepare for the stitches than he had anticipated, and a quarter of the slash had required 2 rows of stitches.

Even though the wound was not closed, Ryuuken was worried, the gash was already beginning to redden around the edges, which indicated inflammation.

"We need to get you antibiotics," Ryuuken concluded.

Uryuu that had been completely silent during the procedure, staring into space, suddenly seemed to wake up.

"Why?" Uryuu asked. That made Ryuuken furrowed his brow; he really didn't like when he was questioned regarding his profession.

"It's beginning to fester," he bit annoyed. He was about to stand up and used his right arm as support and it pained only a little. Just a split second before he would have stretched the arm out completely, it suddenly gave a loud crack that resonated of the walls.

The pain was unbearable for just a moment, causing Ryuuken to grit his teeth and his knees to give out.

He broke the fall with his good arm, but he still found himself on the floor.

"Shit, are you okay?" Uryuu jumped down from the table and thank the gods that the local anesthetics were still working. The sound the shoulder had given had given him the chills and it didn't exactly help that Ryuuken collapsed on himself.

Furthermore, he didn't like that Ryuuken didn't make a sound at all. He found his own hand on his father's shoulder. Fortunately Ryuuken didn't seem to have noticed.

Ryuuken tentatively supported his right arm with his left as he got back on his feet. His adrenaline pumped system was causing his heart to race and his breath to quicken. He was positively panting.

He was surprised that the pain had vanished as soon as it came and he gently, ever so gently, tried move his shoulder about. His surprise grew as he realized that his shoulder was feeling so much better than it had before.

He could even lift his arm without much discomfort.

"What was that all about?" Uryuu asked and looked just as surprised as his father.

"I suppose it wasn't completely back in its socket," Ryuuken reasoned, "-but it certainly is now."

His chest was threatening to erupt in a coughing fit and made his breathing uneven. It even crackled from deep within his lungs, due to the fact that he had suppressed the coughing for so long as he had.

"Are you alright?"Uryuu asked in a surprisingly soft voice, which Ryuuken found most unexpected. He eyed him with an examining look as he didn't quite know if Uryuu was mocking him or if it was genuine. However, that look made Uryuu take a step backwards.

Ryuuken could look so ice cold sometimes and even though he didn't want it to, it brought back memories of his childhood in this house. How his father could look at him like he was some kind of alien, or like he was the lowliest being on the planet. He felt his heart harden.

"I'm fine," Ryuuken then suddenly answered in a light tone as he took off the gloves and mask, "-it doesn't hurt anymore."

Uryuu hadn't expected him to answer at all. Then what was the look about? Could it just be the way his facial features presented themselves when he was focused or concentrated.

No, Uryuu had seen Ryuuken asleep, where his face looked much softer and even younger. But then again, his eyes were what really made him appear so cold; they were narrow and the iris was a light steel grey with a dark out lining that gave him a hard look.

The way he looked at it, Ryuuken as a person resembled a sword; hard, cold, lean, and if you got too close, he would make you bleed. If you crossed him, he would kill you.

Granted at the moment, he looked like a brittle sword, but he would still hurt you before he would break.

However, Ryuuken had surprised him these last couple of days and he didn't know how to react.

"Good," he answered and left the room. He just wanted to get away from the situation.

Ryuuken's gaze lingered long after Uryuu had left.

He got that strong sense that something had made him uncomfortable. He smirked, he was truly an odd child. He couldn't remember himself ever being so awkward in his own skin, even though other trades were remarkably similar to his own.


	16. Chapter 16

He wasn't entirely unhappy that Uryuu had left him alone as a massive coughing fit took hold of him. The spasms shook him to the very core, his ribs causing him agony with every muscle contraction.

It was ridiculous how much puss and other nasty thing could gather in his chest so quickly. Staggering on unstable legs, he found the nearest sink and let the water run to carry the bloodied sputum away. The cough sounded awful.

The fit didn't really stop. He coughed his lungs up for what seemed like ages, even though he was sure that time wise it couldn't have been that long.

He could only look on as the blood he coughed up grew more fresh, more red against the white porcelain sink. It was painfully evident that some of the fine blood vessel in his lungs couldn't handle the strain anymore.

He tried holding his breath to make the cough stop, but he could only hold it for a second before succumbing to the spasms again. His breath continue to hitch every time he exhaled, but he did consider himself lucky that he managed to draw hasty breaths every now and again so that he wouldn't have to be afraid to pass out.

As the spasms lessened in his diaphragm, he let himself sink to the floor in the bathroom and let go of the death grip he had had on the sink.

He had made a mess of the sink and shirt and even the quarry tiles had some drops of blood on them. He supposed he looked rather macabre, but he couldn't find the energy to get to his feet and clean it up.

His breath crackled and wheezed loudly, but at least he could hold the cough back now. In the relative quietness, he suddenly realized that Uryuu was on the phone, talking. He tried listening more intently, but it was hard to make something distinctive out over his noisy breathing.

He looked at the blood again on his sleeves and collar. It wasn't right to cough that much blood, even with pneumonia it was too much, too fresh.

Uryuu suddenly stood in the door way, looking very serious and worried.

"I've called Isshin," he began, "-he's coming over." Ryuuken closed his eyes, _so__that__'__s__who__he__was__calling._

With that said, it really dawned upon Uryuu how much blood it really was as he looked around the sink and on his father. Ryuuken didn't say anything, he just remained there, panting, seemingly struggling to get enough oxygen in his system.

"What's happening?" Uryuu asked and sat down besides the sick man. Ryuuken would have found this rather surprising, but he really didn't waste too much time analyzing it.

"I don't know," he answered breathlessly and shook his head, "-I should be getting better by now."

"But you do look a little better than when we found you in the park," Uryuu half heartedly tried cheering him up.

"The fever is gone, but the cough is getting worse."

"How come?"

"I don't know… I'm hardly smoking at all." Ryuuken answered in a very frustrated tone and he buried his face in his palm.

"But you are smoking?" Uryuu continued.

"I haven't had a cigarette since yesterday."

Uryuu rolled his eyes in resignation; he would hardly consider that an accomplishment. However, he was surprised that he wasn't more bitchy – actually, when he thought about it, he had been rather polite.

Uryuu shuddered as the cold from the floor crept up on him. It struck him that this was one of the bathrooms that wasn't being used and therefore there weren't any warmth in the room.

"We should get you off this floor and into your bed," he said out loud and stood up. He shook his legs a bit to get some blood circulation going.

Ryuuken didn't seem to keen on moving.

"Come on," Uryuu urged and reached his hand out to him. For a second Ryuuken considered his other options, but decided that there was nothing better to grab unto and took his son's hand.

Uryuu helped his father to his feet with ease, he had expected him to be heavier. However, as soon as Ryuuken was back on his feet, he stumbled, grabbed onto the sink and coughed three times with a closed mouth. The wet cough rumbled from deep within his chest.

"You don't look too steady on your feet," Uryuu dared after analyzing Ryuuken's posture.

"I'm fine, just got up too fast," he answered curtly. He hadn't taken more than a couple steps before the cough really returned and stole his breath away. He adeptly produced a handkerchief from his pocket and covered his mouth with it as he coughed wetly.

Halfway down the hallway, he got dizzy from the lack of oxygen. He didn't even realized that he had stumbled before he bumped into the wall.

Before he knew it, Uryuu took his left arm over his slight shoulders and hauled him to his feet again. He cough had taken a relentless hold on him again and showed no sign of stopping. The palm of his hand suddenly felt wet, as the blood had seeped all the way through the double folded handkerchief.

"Come on," Uryuu urged again and practically dragged him to the master bed room. Ryuuken sat down heavily on the edge as the gurgling cough continued. He hated to admit it but the heaving breaths in between the spasm came sound more and more panicked.

"Lie down," Uryuu said in a tired voice and tried coaxing the older man by applying gentle pressure on his shoulder.

It was a rather violent movement that Ryuuken removed Uryuu's hand with, as he shook he head.

"Suffocate," was all Ryuuken could muster in between the harsh motions. Uryuu felt a chill creep down his spine.

"Are you suffocating? Should I call an ambulance?"

Ryuuken shook his head again and with a monumental effort of sheer will power, he stopped he coughing. He breathed deliberately slowly and carefully, trying not to agitate his lungs further and let his shoulders relax again.

Even though he dreaded the sight, he removed the handkerchief from mouth and examined the damage. It was completely soaked through, blood had even seeped between his fingers and was running down his forearm.

He pursed his lips. This was all wrong.

He sighed, which he regretted a second later, when it set off a light cough. He willed it down before it became something insurmountably monstrous.

He continued concentrating on just breathing as he desperately wanted to avoid the cough.

"I'll go get you a towel," Uryuu suddenly interjected. Ryuuken just shot him a sideways glance a short nod.

All this blood wasn't from the pneumonia, Ryuuken concluded, though he was quite sure that is had worsened whatever it was that plagued his body.

It had to have been from where he manipulated spirit particles. He had heard of back lashes, just never ones that were as violent as this and never ones of so long duration. Perhaps this was where the pneumonia kicked in – he had been fine until he had used his Quincy powers though… somewhat.

He suddenly remembered the old Quincy spell book that he had lying around in the basement. Maybe it held some wise words about his condition.

He tried reminiscing what had stood in the book, as he had read it once and he had near photographic memory, but he found that he had repressed it alongside with everything else that had to do with the Quincies.

Once Uryuu turned up again with a wetted towel, he cleaned himself up and wrapped the soaked handkerchief inside the towel so that it could be touched without one having to get blood on them.

"You're welcome to stay and take what you want from your mother's possessions. I'll look through the rest and clear it out some other time," Ryuuken offered without looking at Uryuu, whom shot him a puzzled look.

"Do you have the energy to clear those rooms out by yourself?" he asked disbelievingly.

"I'm not an invalid," Ryuuken replied in a weak voice.

"Right now you are," Uryuu dared. He could see that Ryuuken had to restrain himself not to reply back in his normal harsh way.

"I'll hire a moving crew and have them take what I need to clear out," Ryuuken continue and pinched the bridge of his nose, pushing his glasses upwards.

"You could also just ask for help," Uryuu countered, "-I know it's a radical thought, but it's just a suggestion."

Ryuuken quirked an eyebrow at this comment. He had that defiant tone he remembered from when he was still living here.

"Whatever made me earn that tone?" Ryuuken snapped and met Uryuu's eyes. Unlike when he was younger and still living here, he didn't cower when challenged.

"You're acting like you're stupid," Uryuu spat

"Excuse me?"

"But you're not, so what is this?" Uryuu frantically continued. It seemed they had finally broken the silence and had suffocated them for years.

"What is this?"

"You being all civil? You being so damn sick? Are you dying and trying to amend for a life time of indifference towards me?"

Ryuuken had to admit, the kid had made him speechless. Not alone did Uryuu think him manipulating, he held no trust in him what so ever.

"No, I'm not dying," Ryuuken began tiredly, "-at least not right now."

"I have never seen anyone with pneumonia cough blood."

"It's actually not that unusual," Ryuuken tried to explain, "-however, it's very unusual to cough this much blood."

"Then why are you? And why are you so damn civil all of a sudden?"

"I resent that, I've never been anything but civil."

"You've been nothing but cold and reprimanding."

"You may not approve of my parenting skills, but I have never been anything but civil towards you."

"A five year old doesn't need you to be civil. That is just cold."

"I had just lost my wife," Ryuuken interjected and coughed a bit, "-I was having a hard time."

"I had just lost my mother!" Uryuu clenched his fist so hard that his knuckles were turning white.

"I know that," Ryuuken answered in resignation and seemed to collapse on himself a bit more. Uryuu looked at his father with widened eyes. He found it both odd and irritatingly non-confrontational that he didn't try to make excuses, he just took it in.

"Are you guys really arguing right now?" Isshin asked disbelievingly from the doorway, "-really, at a time like this?"

He sent Uryuu a scolding look before focusing all his attention on Ryuuken.

"You'll continue this conversation another time," Isshin effectively ended their argument, "-you look like hell."

"I know," Ryuuken acknowledged, his gaze not leaving the floor infront of him, "-the cough is getting worse."

"How long have you been coughing blood this time?"

"Since yesterday." Isshin looked at him with accusing eyes.

"And you decided not to say anything?"

"A first it was just tiny brown droplets in the sputum."

"What is it now?"

"Fresh red blood by the ounces," Ryuuken coughed the last three words out.

Isshin's brain suddenly went into overdrive, when he realized what could be.

"We should get you to the hospital," Isshin stared at Ryuuken with serious eyes, "-it could be some sort of platelet problem."

"It's not a platelet problem," Ryuuken immediately dismissed, "-it's a massive back lash."

"You could bleed into your brain any second if I'm right," Isshin continued and sat down besides Ryuuken.

"If you were right, I would have suffered massive internal bleeding when you set my shoulder back, oh so gently," the sarcasm was biting.

Isshin smirked a bit and tried to hide it. At least it was good that the other doctor hadn't lost his sense of humor.

"Will you permit me to listen to your lungs?" Isshin then asked as he produced his stethoscope. Ryuuken's left hand suddenly flew to his chest, when his breath suddenly snagged. Isshin found himself hardly needing any equipment to assess Ryuuken's condition; the cough was loud and wet and it wasn't long before the other man's lips and teeth were visibly bloodied. He willed it down, but his breathing was still labored and coming in short gusts.

He gritted his teeth in obvious pain, only to make an even more disturbing sight.

"Are you sure about the back lash thing?" Isshin asked, eyeing the ailing Ryuuken suspiciously. He just nodded slowly and unbuttoned his shirt. He hated it when other doctors listened to his lungs, the situation was in itself very uncomfortable with another being in his personal space, but fact that it was Isshin didn't exactly help. After all, it was limited how much he could manipulate and control him.

Isshin listened intently from various position on his chest and on his back. It took him forever and Ryuuken spend all that time wishing that Uryuu would have left, but off course the boy had let his curiosity get the better of him and stayed. He stood in the doorway, leaning against the casing and observed the situation with a sour mine on his face.

"Well, I can tell that you haven't gained any weight yet," Isshin commented dryly.

"It's been a week," Ryuuken answered with a shaky voice and cleared his throat. Isshin looked at him with a indefinable facial expression; half sad, half smiling and topped off with a bit of pity.

"Well, I suppose it's superfluous to tell you that there are fluid in your lungs."

Ryuuken couldn't help but chuckled and damned Isshin far away. He couldn't laugh without coughing. Isshin shot him a crooked smile that vanished quickly and transformed smoothly into a serious expression.

"You're gonna cough like hell for the next couple of days," Isshin determined, "-and if it gets any worse than this then it's beyond my capabilities."

"I just need to rest."

"Yes, I know that's what you keep telling me, but I'm not so sure," Isshin interjected.

"Go to the hospital, dad," it suddenly came from the door way and Uryuu found two sets of eyes resting on him, "-you look like hell." Neither Isshin or Ryuuken knew what to say, but Ryuuken felt his heart skip a beat when he heard the magic al word; dad.

Ryuuken felt Isshin beside him turning towards him and awaiting his reaction as well. The comment had come must unexpected, but he couldn't tell how much of a relief it was, even though he was fussing a bit. He sighed carefully.

"If it gets any worse than this, I will," he then found himself promising. Uryuu just gave a short nod and walked out.

Both Isshin and Ryuuken gaze lingered after he's left. Suddenly Isshin turned towards Ryuuken again.

"What the hell did you two talk about?" he exclaimed. Ryuuken was wondering about that himself.

"My lack of parenting skills," he answered and shrugged, "-but I can't explain his reaction. I don't mind it, but… I don't understand."

"From what I heard that wasn't all," Isshin smiled, "-you both spoke like you both were human beings too… about her."

Her, was their universal name for Ryuuken's wife. Isshin knew very well that he didn't like to talk about it.

"She was hardly mentioned."

"But she was," Isshin pointed out, "- he's interested in communicating as well. I think quitting your job was a good thing – I've never experienced you so eager to speak with your son."

Ryuuken shot him an annoyed glance.

"Well, it's easier now." he tried explaining, but that only made Isshin quirk an eyebrow.

"How come?"

"Well, he's an adult now."

Isshin errupted in a roaring belly laugh that even made his water. Ryuuken watched with cool elevated soberness.

"That's the Ryuuken I know," he said with a strained voice, still chuckling.

"I just don't get children," Ryuuken then tried to explain, obviously not getting what was so funny, but that seemed to initiate another wave of uncontrollable laughing from Isshin's side.

Instead Ryuuken started arranging pillows so that he could practically sit up and sleep and allowed himself to lay back.

"You tired?" Isshin asked. Ryuuken hadn't even realized that he'd closed his eyes.

"You finished laughing?" he answered dryly.

"How about your clothes?" Isshin pointed out when Ryuuken's eyes closed again.

"Don't care."

Isshin just sat a while and looked at the other man so exhausted that he couldn't keep himself awake, even though he had the house full of guests.

Isshin decided to just watch over him and let him sleep. He was positively surprised to learn that Uryuu hadn't left, but was rummaging around in his mother's rooms.

The day went on pretty uneventful; Ryuuken was sleeping and coughing, but didn't really wake. Uryuu went through his mother's stuff and popped by the bed room every once in a while to check on his father and Isshin.

By the time the sun had set and Mitsumi was preparing dinner, Isshin decided it was time for Ryuuken to get something to eat and take his medication.

He gently shook his shoulder. Ryuuken didn't react at all, his eyes didn't even flutter.

"Ryuuken," he said, and shook a bit harder. Ryuuken just took the impacts like rag doll, he was completely oblivious.

"Ryuuken," he yelled, adrenaline suddenly kicking his system into high gear. He took to using both hands with the shaking, but to no avail.

Ryuuken was still breathing – that was clear with the wheezing. He checked his pulse. It was slow, but that were to be expected for a person sleeping. He grabbed the stethoscope from his bag and listened to his heart.

Uryuu had been drawn to the room by the sound of Isshin's calls.

"What's the matter?"

"I can't wake him," Isshin quickly explained, the alarm evident in his voice. Roughly he drove a knuckle into Ryuuken's breast bone and moved it about. No reaction. Unresponsiveness to pain was the last straw.

He produced his cell phone from his pocket and made the call.

Poor Ryuuken.

I'm really torturing the guy ;)


	17. Chapter 17

Withering 17

Thanks for the reviews :)

I was thinking about dividing the story from this point onwards – two alternate endings... One "happy", one tragic... what do you think?

Ryuuken awoke with a feeling of being a an alien body. He was groggy, his mind sluggish and his eyes unable to focus.

It was as if, he was inside a bubble. Even voices were distorted beyond recognition. He closed his eyes and decided it was too early to wake up.

Later when he came too, his body felt more like his own. He could move his fingers, and toes and felt more at ease with the feeling of control. When he opened his eyes, he found the world to be too bright and had to squint to make anything out.

That was when he noticed that he wasn't wearing his glasses. He reach out for them, he knew exactly where they were on the night stand. It was a movement he had been used through the vast majority of his life. Except today, where his hand found nothing but air.

"Easy Ryuuken," Isshin voice suddenly whispered and Ryuuken felt his hand rest on his shoulder, "-what do you want?"

"Glasses," he croaked. His voices sounded absurdly abused, like he had contracted a throat infection as well. He scolded himself for thinking that a second later, when he realized he was on antibiotics. His mind was working really slowly.

"Here you go," Isshin said with feigned morning freshness, and put the glasses on Ryuuken's face instead of just handing them to him.

It wasn't until that point that he realized that he wasn't in his bed room. He tried sitting up with a start, but his body was incomprehensibly weak.

"Easy, you're in the hospital," Isshin told him calmly. Ryuuken then realized he was hooked up to an IV through the back of his left hand and electrodes on various sites on his chest and his temples. He wasn't really outraged until he noticed the feeding tube down his nose.

"What the hell," he croaked and gestured the tube, "-have you been force feeding me?"

"You've been out for 8 days," Isshin informed him and tried to sound as calm as possible.

"What?" his voice failed him almost completely.

"I couldn't wake you," Isshin continued explaining patiently, "-I called an ambulance and you were a 4 on the Glasgow scale."

"4?" he asked disbelievingly.

"Yes, there was some muscle contractions when we stuck you with needles, otherwise, you were unresponsive."

"In a coma?"

"Almost, we thought that you had had a brain hemorrhage. You were put in a respirator and you've been scanned from top to toe."

"That explains the throat," Ryuuken croaked, "What's the verdict?"

"They found nothing. They have no idea why you suddenly went into a coma," Isshin told him and awaited an reaction.

Ryuuken gave him very little to work other than a drawn brow.

"8 days?" Ryuuken repeated. Isshin nodded.

"Except for the pneumonia you've been given a clean bill of health," Isshin said with a smile., "- it's good that you quit this place. They are completely incompetent."

"Except they're not," Ryuuken replied, "-It has to be Quincy related."

"I figured as much. Your body started absorbing spirit particles 4 days ago. After that you began improving."

Ryuuken nodded. He really had to figure out what was going on. He then noticed Uryuu sitting in a chair in the corner, listening intently.

Ryuuken had to admit that he was exceedingly surprised that Uryuu was there at all and Uryuu looked equally surprised that he had stayed, now that he had awoken.

He turned his attention towards his right hand and tried to make a fist. His hand obeyed, but slowly and felt as if the grip would have been too weak to even hold a pencil.

"How are you feeling?" Isshin asked, watching the fist.

"Weak."

Isshin chuckled, "-well, you have been immobile for some time now. It should get better soon."

"Who's my attending?" Ryuuken suddenly asked.

"I can't remember actually, you've mostly been seen to by some Heisuke fella."

Ryuuken closed his eyes and groaned. Off course he had to get the overachieving intern he'd run out on earlier in the clinic.

"Your attending is Yuudai Eto," Uryuu interjected from the corned. They made eye contact for a while. Even though they hadn't spend much time together over the last year, he could that he didn't like the man.

"Really?" Ryuuken asked, not sounding too impressed, "-no wonder they haven't worked out what was wrong."

"No, he haven't exactly sprained anything trying to solve it either?" Uryuu commented dryly under his breath.

"Uryuu!" Isshin exclaimed suddenly offended, "-I'm sure he did everything in his power."

Ryuuken chuckled and tried disguising it as a cough. Isshin shot him a disapproving look.

"Oh by the Gods, you two have the same kind of sick humor," Isshin continued in same tone and buried his face in his hands.

Ryuuken's breath suddenly snagged and he lapsed into a spluttering coughing fit. He really felt the weight of every day he had been lying motionless and it hadn't helped clearing out his lungs.

"Yeah, they were forced to use suction a couple of times to help you breathe," Isshin informed him, "-it's been awhile since the last time they did that. It's better that you get coughing yourself to get it out of your system."

Once he could breathe again he addressed Isshin again.

"When can I be discharged?" Ryuuken asked, which earned him a examining look from the other doctor.

"Surely not before a couple of days. They need to finish some tests before they can let you go. You should allow yourself to get some strength back before dashing out of here."

Ryuuken just shrugged his shoulders, but he supposed he was right. He was far too weak to be able to do anything remotely constructive, which meant that for the time being, he might as well stay put.

He must've fallen asleep again, since he couldn't remember what happened up to the point where he started coughing. This time though, he found that he had the strength to sit up as he doubled over with the spasms. The cough was very productive and he thanked the gods that someone passed him a barf bowl to cough the phlegm into. It was yellowy green and thick and hard to cough up.

"Better out than in," he heard Isshin comment to his left, helplessly patting his back at the same time. Slowly Ryuuken regained his breath and stayed sitting upright. It please him greatly that some of his strength had been restored.

"Better?" Isshin asked while elevating the bed, allowing Ryuuken to lean back.

"Yes, thank you," he answered and coughed a couple of times again, "-how long was I out this time?"

"Oh, just 10 hours," Isshin said with a smile, "-you look better too." Ryuuken nodded.

"Have they finished the tests yet?" The question made Isshin chuckle.

"No, some tests have to be done with you awake." Ryuuken took the information and nodded again.

"Where's Uryuu?"

"Once you were out of the woods he went back home to get some sleep so that he could return to school,"

"Good. How about your clinic?"

"I hired a substitute." Ryuuken closed his eyes and let the guilt overwhelm him.

"I'll help out as soon as I'm better."

"Yeah," Isshin smirked, "-I'm counting on it. I'll just go out and get the doctor."

Ryuuken's gaze lingered on Isshin retreating form and he could tell that Isshin was unbelievably worn out. He sighed heavily.

The tests were completed uneventfully and they didn't add anything to their conclusions – they were completely at a loss as to why he had been in a coma. Isshin went home to his children and clinic and Ryuuken actually appreciated some time alone.

2 days later he left the hospital. He had barely closed the front door behind him before he had a sobbing Mistumi hanging around his neck. She was squeezing him tightly, as if she was afraid that he would disappear. Ryuuken felt like a deer caught in the head light. He was so desperately poorly equipped to handle these kinds of situations.

He tried giving it a little time, thinking that she would have to let him go eventually. However, she kept sobbing into his shirt.

Tentatively he put one arm around her and felt a pang through his chest when he felt the girl was shaking. Still, he had no idea what to say to her.

"The house has been so empty," she whispered in gusts, not able to control her breathing still.

"I'm sorry," Ryuuken found himself saying. Slowly she released his grip on him and looked straight at him with big pleading eyes.

"Are you alright now? She asked, still trying to compose herself.

"I'm fine," he answered tiredly and resumed taking off his coat.

"What was wrong with you?"

"They don't know," Ryuuken explained and shrugged his shoulders, "-they couldn't find anything wrong with me except for the pneumonia."

"How is your chest?" she continued prying. He would have been seriously put off by it, had it been anyone else, but she was just so damned sweet. She suddenly grabbed him by the arm and hauled him into the living room, "-what am I thinking, you shouldn't be out he in the cold corridor. Come on, I've made you some tea."

"I'm really not made of china," Ryuuken attempted to dismiss her, "- and I'm recovering just fine now."

"Really? You're getting better?" she asked as if it was something totally unexpected. He quirked an eyebrow.

"Yes, most people recover from pneumonia, especially if they're on antibiotics," he answered with a hint of sarcasm. She sent him an annoyed glance.

"Well, not all recover from spontaneously lapsing into a coma," she countered with uncharacteristic sharpness as she poured him tea. A ghost of a crooked smile swept across Ryuuken face; the girl wasn't completely without edge.

She let him drink a couple of sips of the tea, before she continued.

"So what now?" she asked. To Ryuuken this was completely out of the blue.

"What do you mean?"

"What do you want to do now?"

"Right now, I'm going back to bed and when I'm rested I'll have to think about moving."

"Moving?" she exclaimed.

"Yes, I want to move to something smaller," he sighed, "-something not quite so filled with memories."

"Oh," she added subdued and looked down into her tea cup.

"Don't worry, I'm not suddenly going to start cleaning and cooking myself," he added, reading her. Her face brightened with a dazzling smile.

"Really? I was afraid that now that you were without a job that you might couldn't afford it."

"Don't worry," he took a sip of the tea, "-someone like me is never without a job for long. I'm just waiting for the right opportunity."

He was mildly surprised how much he enjoyed company that didn't consist of other doctors.

"So when will you graduate?" he asked when she seemingly had satisfied her curiosity.

"In little under a year," she replied with a pleasant smile, "-I can't wait."

"So do you have any plans?"

"Well, I sincerely hope that I can get a job at the university."

"You want to teach?"

"No, I want to do research," she beamed, "-but I suppose I can't avoid a bit of teaching."

"Anthropological research?" he repeated mostly to himself, she nodded eagerly, "-doesn't that require a lot of traveling?"

This apparently surprised her as she laughed.

"No, you don't necessarily have to study small African villages to research anthropology," she smiled overbearingly. Apparently it was a common mistake, "-I want to study the social networks in the education system."

"Oh? That sounds very interesting," Ryuuken replied and suddenly saw her as a grown woman as oppose to the girl he usually viewed her as.

"Yes, doesn't it?" Her positivity had renewed his energy for as long as it could, but now the feeling of safety of being home and the tea and the couch suddenly made him really drowsy. He tried to cover up a yawn.

"Are you alright?" she asked and sent him an examining look.

"Fine, I'm just tire very easily still. It should get better quickly."

He left Mitsumi to clean up and slowly found his bedroom. He practically fell asleep the second his head hit the pillow.

It felt like he slept the better part of a week away. He had only been up to eat and take his medication and to cough. He didn't feel like it got much better, but suddenly Sunday morning he woke up to sunlight and felt completely rested and energized.

After a long bath, looking himself in the mirror he found that his hair seemingly overnight had grown an inch. He tried letting it fall like he usually allowed it too, but it was simply too long to work with. He rummaged through the cabinets and found a hair wax. It had been years since he'd tried using something like that.

With the wax distributed between his fingers, he loosely combed his hair back with his fingers, desperately trying to get it out of his eyes.

It brought immediate satisfaction to see the hair staying where he wanted it too. However, it was strange to see how much it changed his appearance – especially with all the weight he'd lost, he looked like a completely different person.

He passed his office and wasn't really planning to spend much time in there. However, his eyed the massive stack of unopened mail waiting for him. He sighed heavily and made himself comfortable in the chair behind the desk.

Most of it was rubbish and boring things like bills and pension statements. Still, there was one letter that really caught his eyes; it was from Karakura University, his old university. He let his fingers ghost over the finicky writing on the envelope and let his mind momentarily wander to his days at the university. It had been a good time in his life.

He cautiously opened it and was a little surprised to find a old Japanese styled hand written letter.

Suddenly the phone rang. Ryuuken damn well nearly had a heart attack.

"Ishida Ryuuken," he answered quickly with a stern voice.

"Hello Ishida-san, this is Tsutaya Makaru from Karakura University," the elderly gentleman man at the other end introduced himself. Ryuuken recognized the name as the director of the university.

"Hello Tsutaya-sempai," Ryuuken greeted in an equally stern tone.

"I've tried to reach you ever since I heard that you quit as director for the hospital," he tried to explain, "-however, you have proven a difficult man to catch." "I've even sent you a letter."

"I know. I was just in the process of opening it."

"I sent it almost 2 weeks ago. Have you been slacking off?"

"Oh, you might have heard that I fell ill," Ryuuken rolled his eyes.

"Yes, you always were bad at taking care of your own health, Ishida." Ryuuken chose not to comment, "-however, I was considering if you were interested in lending us your skills and teach our senior medical and administration students."

"You always were annoyed that I chose the hospital instead, weren't you?" Ryuuken countered, the ball suddenly in his court, "-you know I won't do it for free." Ryuuken felt a mischievous smile dawn upon his face.

"Of course, Ishida. You never do," he could hear that he was smiling in his voice, "I'll match whatever the hospital paid you."

So it was a real offer. Ryuuken leaned back in the chair and winced. This was one of those times were he desperately wanted a smoke. He tried busying his hands with a pen instead.

"What do you say Ishida?"

"When?" Ryuuken asked.

"We'll have to have time to advertise the courses and take applications in. I suspect your first day of teaching would be in a month."

Ryuuken sighed inaudible.

"I'll even throw an office in with it."

"University offices aren't actually something you brag about, Tsutaya."

"I'll make it one of the good ones in the new buildings," he offered. Ryuuken smirked – the old man was hungry.

"Sure," he finally agreed.

"Superb," the old man laughed, "-we'll start advertising right away. Why don't you come over tomorrow and we'll discuss your contract. Around 9?"

"Fine, I'll see you then."

As he hung up, he cast a glance at one of the shelve units, filled to the brim. Now he would finally have some use for it.

For years he had collected material for teaching. He had always counted on teaching at some point. Just not so early in his life, but that was a minor detail.

He looked through the drawers to find something to write on, when he without thinking, opened the drawer that container his stock of cigarettes. He faltered.

Absentmindedly he removed his glasses and let them dangle freely from his fingers as he rubbed eyes with the other hand. He knew he shouldn't. He truly did.

That didn't keep him from grabbing on the packs and removing the plastic seal. Taking one cigarette between his fingers, he studied it intently. Sighing heavily, he shook his head before placing the cigarette between his lips and resumed looking for paper. And a lighter.

Finding his calendar he noted the appointment with Tsutaya. Hesitantly he removed the cigarette from his lips again and played with it between his fingers.

He knew he had lighters in his jackets, hanging in the entrance hall. He damned himself for finishing opening the letters, which meant he had nothing to distract himself with. He decided that he might as well give in now, 'cause he wasn't going to be able to hold it off much longer. Getting back on his feet, he grew more capricious as he neared the entrance hall with the problem weighing between his fingers.

When he suddenly heard the back door open, he almost praised the gods and just hid the cigarette in a jacket pocket.

"You're here early," he greeted Mitsumi as soon as she entered the kitchen.

It was evident that she hadn't seen him come in as she started and dropped her bags. She met his gaze with a pair of frightened eyes.

"Oh it's you, Ishida-sama," she breathed and let her shoulders relax again, " – you startled me."

"Ryuuken," he reminded her, "- I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention."

"it's alright," she smiled a bit embarrassed, "-I'm going out to dinner with one of my girls friends tonight, so I wanted a head start."

"You do know that you could take the day off if you need to."

"Thank you Ryuuken," she smiled more warmly and looked away, trying to busy herself with the groceries, "-but I also wanted to see how you were doing."

"Oh?"

"You've been sleeping so much lately," she added, but didn't elaborate further.

"I'm feeling quite rested today, thank you," Ryuuken tried answering and wondered why it suddenly felt so awkward to interact with her.

"What have you done with your hair?" she suddenly asked. For a moment he didn't know what she was talking about, before he brushed his hand over his combed back hair.

"It has grown too long. I need a hair cut."

"Okay," she acknowledged and studied him further, which made him feel really uncomfortable, "-you should consider keeping it this way. It suits you."

She said it like it was nothing, tone light and with an approving smile and went straight back to putting the groceries in the refrigerator.

"You look tired," Ryuuken noted after studying her for a while in silence. She gave a quick smile without looking at him, but it was nowhere near as dazzling as her usual smiles.

"We have a major project due tomorrow, so I've be burning the midnight oil a bit," she explained and sat down at the small dining table in the kitchen.

"End semester project?" Ryuuken asked and sat down opposite her, frowning; he did not like seeing her like this.

"Yes, but now we're done now. We printed last night."

"Team project?"

"Yes, it's something new that the university is trying. They believe that it'll prepare us better for the real world if we work in teams." Ryuuken considered this for a moment. It was very different from the time he went to the university.

"I'm inclined to say that they're right."

"After this project – so am I," she chuckled, "-it certainly has been educating to work with 2 other people under pressure."

"When is it due?" he asked, smiling at her observation.

"We'll hand it in tomorrow," she smiled tiredly.

"Then how long to the oral exams?"

"3 weeks," she nodded, "-so that helps a little. Gives a little extra time to study"

"Good," he announced and stood up, "-but let's make a deal."

She looked at him without really comprehending.

"Sure," she uttered with uncertainty lacing her voice.

"Don't come here tomorrow before you're fully rested," he said with a smile. However, he tried to disguise it again, when he realized what he was doing.

"Ok, that's a deal."

He was just about to leave, when he felt her hand on his arm.

"Have you had breakfast yet?" the simple question fell. Ryuuken could almost feel himself blush.

"No, I haven't had the chance yet," he tried to brush it off. She shook her head with a subdued smile.

"You are really hopeless with keeping to meal times."

"I know," he rolled his eyes and sat back down, "I suppose I'm too used to not having the time to eat."

"You always have time to eat."

Ryuuken quirked an eyebrow and slipped into his sarcastic mode.

"Oh the spirit of the youth is inspiring," he commented in a dry unimpressed tone.

"Hey," she said with a feigned hurt voice and smacked him on the shoulder, "-it's a question of prioritizing."

Ryuuken just laughed mockingly. The sound made Mitstumi stopped in her tracks; as far as she could remember, she hadn't heard Ryuuken laugh ever. She liked it, even though it was at her expense.

"Don't laugh at me," she chuckled with a smile as she began to prepare a meal.

"You're just so innocent and unspoiled, it's sweet," he added still laughing, the sound having grown kinder.

"I may be many things, but I'm not innocent," she comment in an entirely different tone of voice that took Ryuuken aback. It was loaded.

For a second he didn't quite know what to do with himself, but deciding to deflect.

"That may be so, but regarding work life, even though you work part time besides your studies, you're a novice," Ryuuken added seriously, "-I don't think you have considered that there's only so much that you can down prioritize when you work at a hospital."

She turned around with a look upon her face that clearly indicated that she was considering what he'd said.

"It's human lives," he added for the effect.

"Point taken," she gave him. Their eyes met for an intense second – before Ryuuken started to laugh again when he couldn't keep a straight face anymore.

Mitsumi looked at him in wonder. She had thought he's been serious.

"I was the director," he half laughed half cough, "- half the time it's legal matters or budgets."

"You're just plain mean today, aren't you?"

That comment just made him laugh harder, but it turned into a regular coughing fit. He willed it down quickly after that.

"I'm sorry," he said with a mischievous smile, "-I just couldn't help myself."

"No, it's okay," she dismissed, "-I'm glad to see you so full of life. It's been a while."


	18. Chapter 18

Withering 18.

Thanks for the review :) They keep me going! Happy birthday to Ryuuken!

The following day he awoke with possibly even more energy restored. He found one of his new suits that he was rather excited about from the closet. It was a matt dark navy blue suit that complemented his skin and hair tone nicely and accentuated his V-shaped stature, even though it was slighter than it used to be.

He was getting seriously agitated with the length of his hair, even though Mitsumi thought it suited him, and he spent quite a lot of time getting it styled so that it looked presentable.

He noticed that he had to squint to see himself in the mirror somewhat clearly, which testified to the fact that a visit to the optician was long overdue. Even though he didn't want to admit it, he was beginning to suspect that something more was affecting his sight than just general degeneration and age. For now he had to settle for just polishing his glasses.

The house was quiet today, almost eerily so. Mitsumi would come in later today, Uryuu was living his life and Isshin was tending his clinic. He had no one besides those 3 in his life.

He chuckled slightly, the sound bouncing of the walls in the hall, when he realized that one of those, he paid to be in his life. The irony of it made him smile crookedly and that only seemed to add to his energy. He didn't even need coffee this morning.

"Shit," he muttered to himself and placed his palm over his stomach. That reminded him that he'd forgotten about breakfast. It was going to take some effort to get in the habit of remembering such things.

Opening the refrigerator, he felt his heart glow a bit when there was a plate with a post-it on it.

"Eat," was all it said in Mitsumi elegant handwriting. He couldn't help but find another post-it note for himself and write, "thanks," on it and placed it so that it was visible when Mitstumi would open the fridge again.

He had plenty of time left before the meeting so he decided to sit on the couch and watch the news while eating. He couldn't remember the last time he had enjoyed such a luxury.

It took him a while, but he actually managed to finish the whole meal she had plated for him. When he discovered he still had about an hour before the meeting, he decided on walking to the university. After all he desperately needed the exercise and he felt so awake that he didn't quite know what to do with himself.

He packed the necessary papers and on his standard jacket, but when he got outside, he found that the temperature had dropped dramatically, even his lungs rebelled against the cold air and send him coughing wildly.

He hadn't had a chance to look outside before going, but the air was cold and quiet and frost covered every surface.

The sun was just beginning to crawl over the horizon, making the frost glitter. It was beautiful.

As he went back inside to change jacket and get a scarf, he noted that it was unusually early this year for sub zero temperatures. He found his heavy woolen black winter coat that reached him to about mid thigh and a classic matching scarf.

Now well armed to face the cold, he set off to face the university director. Ryuuken sighed heavily to himself; the director was no slight opponent, so it was a good thing that he felt so energized. He knew if the director could, he would definitely turn corners with him, so would have to stay focused, because the old man was extraordinarily clever. He had tried once before engaging the director in a wage negotiation and had turned him down when he couldn't get what he wanted. The director had been unyielding, so he had been surprised when he had offered to match his pay he had been getting from the hospital. However, he still felt critical against anything that man said after an incident he experienced when he was still studying at the university.

He shook himself against the cold and dug his hand in his jacket pockets, where his right hand found a cigarette. Just one. He placed it between his fingers and looked at it like he'd done yesterday. He tentatively breathed, the air coming out in the cold air as a mist and considered himself lucky that he hadn't brought a lighter.

That was when he felt a familiar weight in the inner breast pocket of the jacket. He rolled his eyes and put the cigarette between his lips and produced the lighter.

"Just this once," he muttered to himself and lit it. Inhaling deeply, he frowned when he seemingly didn't recognize the taste. Taking it between his fingers again he looked at it to see if it was a different brand than he usually smoked. He didn't remember the taste being so bitter. He exhaled slowly through his nostrils, which was not something he usually did, but now it stung like hell and he ended up coughing to expel the smoke.

He supposed that these weeks had made a difference in his tolerance after all. He considered his options once more before bringing the cigarette back to his lips and inhaling. At least it felt warm.

But smoking was nowhere near as pleasant as he remembered it to be.

Half way to the university he concluded that he was in exceptionally bad shape, as even just walking winded him. He really needed to work on getting back in shape; he absolutely hated not being able to defend himself, if it came to that. His lungs even worked up a bit of a wheezing sound, but he supposed that the smoking didn't help the matter either.

He finished the cigarette and put it out. He noticed the feeling the nicotine gave washing in over him, calming him, preparing him for the meeting. The feeling was even more pronounced now that it had been a while since the last time he smoked.

Tsutaya looked exactly like Ryuuken remembered him, even though he'd aged 10 years. Ryuuken supposed that the director was the kind of man who looked old quite early on, but wouldn't change physically for decades.

The university director was a relatively tall man with gold rimmed reading glasses almost permanently residing at the tip of his nose. Ryuuken half expected he kept the glasses on because it made him look more stern. However, even though the man was approaching 70, he looked as sharp as ever. The only difference Ryuuken managed to pick up on was that his eye brows had grown even bushier and his hair line had receded even further.

Ryuuken considered his own appearance for a moment and how vastly different he looked now from what he'd looked like 10 years ago.

Their greeting was short and formal. Ryuuken immediately felt under pressure - Tsutaya was an intense man to be in the same room with. Deciding that he wasn't going to let the old man have the upper hand, he straightened back up and followed him into the old fashioned office, where the walls seemed to consist of books. He noticed that Tsutaya was studying him.

"You look good compared to the photos I saw of you in the papers," Tsutaya noted and sat down, letting his arms rest on the arms rests and connecting his finger tips in front of his face. It was a strange hesitant pose.

"I've been in the papers?" Ryuuken commented unimpressed.

"Oh yes, you've been a hot topic after you collapsed at the fund raiser. Especially after the reporters discovered that you were a bachelor," the director adopted a strange crooked smile that looked misplaced on his face.

"That I can even become a topic only indicates that there had been nothing remotely interesting to report the last month," Ryuuken dismissed and sat down in the chair in front of the desk.

Tsutaya chuckled.

"What was wrong with you?" he pried, suddenly very serious.

"You do know that I'm not obliged to answer that, right?" Ryuuken countered.

"Cancer then," Tsutaya immediately concluded. Ryuuken rolled his eyes.

"Do you think I would be here, taking a new position if it indeed was cancer?"

"Probably not, but one never knows, especially concerning you – after all, you are a workaholic."

Ryuuken sighed and met the director's eyes again.

"I was just a bit over worked and I'd forgotten to eat."

"You don't lapse into a coma because you're overworked," Tsutaya cooly commented. Ryuuken gave a crooked smile.

"You know about that?"

"Yes, I would like to say that I know it because of my countless connections, but I'm afraid that was in the papers as well."

Ryuuken suddenly felt very cold. He had preferred that not to be common knowledge and swore silently to find person that had leaked this to the press.

"You don't have to worry so much about my health, Tsutaya. I'm recovering just fine," Ryuuken tried to deflect through clenched teeth.

Tsutaya nodded once, apparently taking the hint and instead produced an expensive looking wooden box. He slid it across the desk towards Ryuuken.

"I know it's not your usual brand, but I know you like a smoke," he offered and opened the box to reveal Cuban cigars.

Ryuuken was torn. He knew he didn't need it, but the situation had developed into something he didn't like and occupying his hands with a cigar would help immensely.

He took one. Placing it briefly under his nose, he relished in the sweet spiced smell. It had been a very long time since the last time he had a cigar. Tsutaya joined him and handed him the cutter. Ryuuken adeptly took the end off and gave it back to Tsutaya.

Soon a thick sweet smelling smoke filled the room

Ryuuken started coughing a bit, but forced it down before Tsutaya really noticed. Leaning forward, Ryuuken decided to tackle the topic head on and produced his old contract from his briefcase, where his old salary was listed in.

"For documentation," Ryuuken added as he handed it to Tsutaya, whom quickly turned on to the right page. The face he made, made Ryuuken's day.

"You've certainly made it up in the world," Tsutaya limited his spoken reaction to.

"Certainly," Ryuuken only commented and took a puff of the cigar.

"The position we are prepared to offer you is only 20 hour week though," Tsutaya then revealed.

"20 hours?" Ryuuken asked, trying to subdue his bitter smile.

"Yes, you would host 2 classes a week and counsel 3 project teams," Tsutaya explained, "-I'm sure you have plenty of opportunity to fill out the remaining 20 hours of the week with all of the offers coming your way."

Ryuuken nodded, he was indeed curious to see what other offers that was waiting for him – and he needed time to help out Isshin getting back on track with his clinic.

Tsutaya eyed him suspiciously, "-you're accepting this?"

Ryuuken shrugged his shoulders and took another puff of the cigar, "-Sure. As you said, I have plenty of other offers that could fill out the rest, but I must admit, I'm not overly eager to go back 100 hour work weeks."

"You must have gotten one hell of a scare," Tsutaya concluded and held eye contact, "-this doesn't sound like the Ryuuken Ishida I know."

Ryuuken suddenly sported an enigmatic smile, "-don't worry Tsutaya… you don't know me at all."

Calmly they went over the legal matters and it was evident that Tsutaya had tried to cover the University as best to his abilities. However, he had tried to be fair to Ryuuken as well.

Ryuuken was just about to sign the contract when he suddenly felt his chest constrict. He tried subduing it, but that only made his breath sound labored as the air in the office unexpectedly felt twice as thick as it had 2 minutes ago. Tsutaya noticed his discomfort and now that the cat was out of the bag, Ryuuken let the cough consume him. It was wet again and it had a new distinctive wheezing sound to it, that testified to the fact that his poor lungs had been under a lot of strain for an extended amount of time. Also for the first time Ryuuken acknowledged that he was very much short of breath.

Tsutaya was watching him struggle with a look of elevated calmness that Ryuuken certainly didn't approve of. He really wanted to stop, wanted to pretend that it was no more than a slight cough, but he knew that he was long past that point. Dammit.

He should have turned down the cigar, that was for sure.

Slowly the spasms let go of their hold and it turned into a humorless bitter laugh. Tsutaya continued to study him, appearing to be less than amused.

"It was common pneumonia that knocked me off my feet," Ryuuken revealed and coughed a couple of times more, "-it'll take a couple of months before my lungs are up to speed again."

"Good thing that you have about month before you'll be in front of a class," Tsutaya commented dryly, "-you make one bad example of a doctor, when you can't take care of yourself."

"Even doctors get sick, you know," Ryuuken argued.

"True, but they usually don't smoke."

"I've cut back," Ryuuken replied, "- and trying to muster enough strength of will to quit entirely."

Tsutaya just nodded approvingly and ushered the physical contract closer to Ryuuken, indicating that he wanted it signed. Ryuuken sighed heavily and signed it with his typical sloppy doctor's signature.

Now he was bound again.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

A/N Thought I was dead? Muahahah!

It didn't take longer than a couple of hours of leisure to make Ryuuken go absolute insane. He was too well organized and well prepared – he had left himself with nothing left to do than to focus on not smoking.

However, the cough that the cigar he smoked earlier, had produced was so far enough to deter him from smoking anymore today.

He was even so bored that he went out into the kitchen to check out if the fridge was hiding anything remotely appetizing enough to eat. That was something that he hadn't done since he was a teenager. It revealed nothing easy to make or eat and he ended up settling for an apple.

The crisp sweet apple distracted him for about 5 minutes before he began pacing the halls again. He checked his email again and paced the halls. He checked his phone and emptied his mailbox outside and went back to pacing the halls.

Like a typical teenager he went back into the kitchen to see if something interesting had appeared in the fridge since the last time he checked. He rolled his eyes at his own behavior, when he realized what he was doing. This was something he would've expected from Uryuu.

Not that Uryuu was much more interested in food than he was, but Uryuu had been through the phase where he apparently suffered a particular hunger that only teenagers suffered from, where no amount of food could satisfy him and he stayed as thin as ever.

Ryuuken stopped in his tracks, had he ever experienced that himself? He couldn't really remember and during his teenage years he had been part of a vigorous training regime set up by some of the elders in the Quincy clan they had been a part of. He had been taught that hunger was something to be ignored.

He shook his head at his own chain of thought; it was ridiculous where the brain ended up, when giving free reign. He had not thought about his Quincy childhood in decades – he had made himself forget.

But he apparently hadn't complete forgotten.

Another faint memory struggled to be allowed to the surface. He faintly remembered a book, a thick old worn book filled with Quincy knowledge – at a time it had been his bible.

He remembered it's smell suddenly. Silly thing to remember.

He hadn't seen the thing in over 20 years and for a second he wondered where he'd put it. Desperately wanting to avoid being sucked into that whole thing again, he distracted himself by going back into the kitchen and searched all the cupboards.

After that he could conclude that the kitchen wasn't big enough and that Mitsumi kept a maniacally clean and neat kitchen. Also he found an unopened pack of biscuits that he immediately went onboard in.

Perhaps he really was hungry. Or maybe he was just bored, he didn't care too much either way – it wasn't like he was in danger of getting fat.

He couldn't have placed the book anywhere in the living area – otherwise, he would've seen it from time to time. He cursed silently, his mind seemed determined to go back to that retched book.

That only place left was the building that neighbored the garage where there was a couple of old chests or the basement, where he seldomly went down for anything but wine.

Taking another biscuit from the pack he considered his options for a while; he could try and ignore this sudden urge to locate this book or he could indulge it. The former would most likely be the more boring option and he was beginning to feel the nicotine need eat away at this patience.

Deciding that looking for the book most likely was the least destructive of the two options, he indulged his subconscious under protest.

The cold stale air seeping up from the basement manifested itself in a ridiculously cold handle that made Ryuuken retract his hand at first, completely unprepared, when he tried opening the door.

He took a step backwards, staring at the handle and absentmindedly cradling his hand.

The touch had triggered a series of more suppressed memories and images of the time, where he'd cut his ties with the Quincy way. His breath quickened as the long gone feeling of devastation swam over him yet again. He had been so disappointed in their inability to listen to reason.

His father had been so disappointed in him.

Why did the cold basement handle suddenly provoke these memories that he had forgotten so successfully. He tore his eyes from the door and looked down the hallway.

He needed a cigarette.

Sighing repeatedly he remained unmoving, staring at nothing in particular as he contemplated continuing his flight from his past. However, he had been down that road so many times and he knew exactly where it ended; nowhere. Nowhere also usually meant too many cigarettes, too long hours, and too much alcohol.

He had done it too many times now and his body was beginning to suffer the consequences.

Perhaps he was old enough now and the wound not to fresh. Maybe he could handle it. Maybe.

Slowly he turned his attention towards the basement door again. He faltered for just a second before his hand made contact with cool steel and found himself imminently surprised when absolutely nothing happened.

The approaching winter's cold had really taken hold of the dark basement and it made the tall man shudder. The low ceiling forced Ryuuken to duck once he reached the floor, his slight movements raising the thick layer of dust that coated everything. Fumbling in the dark, his fingers found the light switch. Flipping it on, the fluorescent tubes blinked a couple of times before bathing the rooms in a dull yellow light.

It had been a long time since he had been down here for anything but the wines in the wine rack at the bottom of the stairs.

The neighboring room was locked behind a heavy wooden door, which design testified to how old the house really was.

Then he realized that the door wasn't locked, it just bound like hell. Pressing his shoulder against it, he slowly opened it, whilst the bottom of the door scraped the floor and the hinges screamed at the sudden motion. Dust whirled up into the air and the door's progress was suddenly cut short by Ryuuken that suddenly choked. The cough exploded in his chest when the foreign particles entered his air ways and the force of it rendered him weak as a newborn foal.

Terribly out of breath he struggled to breathe in, but every time he tried, his breath snagged on the dust filled air. He realized that he had put himself in a situation that possibly could be dangerous to his health. He mentally scolded himself as he backed away towards the stair case – being a doctor himself he really should know better.

When his vision began to fail, he knew that he was in trouble.

Panic began tearing at his nerves, threatening to cloud his logical mind. The dust was much thicker and his lungs much more sensitive than he anticipated. Feeling the desperate need for oxygen looming to overpower him, he forced air into his abused lungs and tried to ignore the spasms that

Tried ignoring his midriff that contracted wildly as he did so.

His breathing was superficial and gasping at best, but couldn't allow himself to too picky; air was air.

Again he found himself scarcely believing that he really was in that bad health at only 44 years of age. It surely didn't bode well for the future.

Also he hated admitting to himself that he had been in danger of fainting during the coughing fit – it was simply a foreign thought to him that he had rendered himself that weak and sickly.

"Ryuuken?" he heard a small voice calling from upstairs, "-is that you?"

Ryuuken rolled his eyes and cursed in the strongest terms under his breath.

"Yes, I'm down here," he croaked, making his voice break and him subsequently going back to choking and coughing. It took just as much will power as before to will the spasms down.

"What are you doing down here," Mitsumi asked as she carefully ventured down the stairs while taking in the dimly lit surroundings. Seeing and hearing Ryuuken struggling to draw breath made her focus on him again, "-are you alright?"

"Fine," he coughed the word out, "- dusty," he added and gestured the door, hoping she would noticed the dust cloud.

He was mildly and sad to say slightly pleasantly surprised when she started coughing as well .

"Oh God, how can you be down here," she spluttered and immediately went for one of the small high placed windows and struggled against the rusty hinges to force it open. Ryuuken intercepted her attempt when he could see that she was getting near hysterical when she couldn't open it.

With two small well placed cuffs, he managed to open the uncooperative window and the cool fresh air welled in.

She almost startled him with the hard look she gave him when he turned around again.

"I warmed it up for you!" she suddenly and awkwardly shot. He grinned when he realized what it was about.

"Of course you did," he answered in a strained voice and coughed a couple of times more. Her eyes softened a bit.

"What were you thinking being down here?" she then asked in an attempted accusing tone.

"I was looking for a book."

"Have you tried your bookshelves in your office?"

He shot her a warning look, "-it's an old book that I think I stored down here many years ago. I haven't seen it since."

"What kind of book?"

"The kind about magic rainbows and pink fluffy bunnies."

She quirked an eyebrow and couldn't quite suppress a crooked smile. His tone of voice was completely flat and revealed no emotion. It was a good thing that she knew he liked his sarcasm.

"You know it's okay to say that you simply don't what to tell me."

"I know," he answered turned his attention back to the heavy wooden door, "-I opted for the more humorous alternative, but I guess you figured that out."

Putting his shoulder to the door, he forced it the last bit until it was fully opened. More dust whirled into the air and sent him coughing yet again.

The room was very dark, but Ryuuken could sort of make out some very old chests and shelves along the walls – everything covered in a thick layer of dust. He sighed in defeat.

But the need to find the book was only growing stronger within his heart. He more felt than knew that the book contained vital information. In his mind it was becoming exceedingly important to find the book. He couldn't explain it, he just felt the urgency.

He went straight to examining all of the book that lays on the shelves methodically.

Mitsumi resigned herself to just leaning on the door and make sure that Ryuuken's breathing didn't get any worse than it already was. She didn't like the sound of the rasp it had already developed and judging by the length of each inhale, he wasn't getting a lot of air in at all.

However, he looked remarkably good today, she noticed and bit her lip. He was in one of his best suits and he was still sporting the new hair style and she decided he had the kind of build that she liked. She couldn't help it; she liked her men tall and lean. The stern focused look he was currently wearing as he searched the shelves and the occasional book, didn't make it any worse for sure.

As soon as he grabbed the old leather bound book, so covered in dust that it was unrecognizable, he knew it was the right one. It fit his hand like no other book – he'd used it so much once, that his palm print was forever worn into the leather

"You found it?" Mitsmu curiously chirped from behind him.

"Yes," he breathed and let his fingers ghost over the surface of the cover.

"What's it about?" she asked. Ryuuken cleared his throat and moved the book out of her view. Instead he met his gaze.

"Just an old text book," he answered in a mild tone of voice, hoping that that would stop her asking anymore.

He dismissed Mitsumi rather rudely and barred himself in his office with the old book. He felt anxious, but not really understanding why he did that.

Curiously he began reading it from the beginning. The memory of reading the ancient text reappeared in his head as the read on. His Quincy education slowly returned into his awareness, despite his best efforts to forget.

There were long descriptions of what spirit particles were and how they functioned, detailed analysis of flow points in the Quincy body and how they could enforce certain kinds of spells, and flow patterns of spirit particles. All basic knowledge for a Quincy.

He grimaced as he remembered Uryuu's sloppy self-taught style that was all over the place and hopeless inefficient. It really was a mockery that Uryuu dared to call himself the last Quincy. He had no idea what the word really meant.

The book went unto to the more advanced stuff; forming arrows, flash stepping, and other basic spells. Then onto multiple arrow drawing and firing, shield forming, wall forming, and explosions.

The most advanced stuff was basically telekinesis; the ability to manipulate spirit particles and to have it manifest itself both in physical form and as an invisible force outside of the body. This ability, once perfected allowed the Quincy to perform the most advanced spells in the books.

Ryuuken had been on this level once. However, he hadn't practised it in years and the telekinesis required almost daily training.

Ryuuken slammed the book shut when it suddenly knocked on the door and Mitsumi entered. She stopped dead in her tracks, when she noticed the eyes Ryuuken was sending her.

"Sorry, I only wanted to know if you wanted you dinner served in here or in the living room," she asked and fidgeted a bit with her apron. Ryuuken was just about to tell her that he wasn't hungry, but caught it before it came out.

"In here would be fine," he answered her in a level tone, "-I have a lot of work to do."

She nodded and disappeared out the door again.

He opened the book again and adjusted his glasses. The book continued with Quincy battle techniques for single fighters, duos, quartets, and whole armies.

It went on with healing. This was a category for itself and Ryuuken was not well schooled. He had been trained a fighter and as a squad leader for their special fighting teams, called quartets.

However, under the healing subject was an entire chapter for back lashes. He drew a shuddering breath and read intently, analyzing every word, every sentence.

He even ignored Mitsumi that came in with his food, thinking it was without consequence that she saw the book – she couldn't read the old language anyway.

He took notes and added his own symptoms and read on. The healer's way of using spirit particles were very different from using it for fighting – actually quite the opposite and many regards.

Apparently the use of spirit particles could damage from within as well if something went wrong and the book contained several intricate matrixes about the correlation between the spirit particle flow, flow patterns, spells, and finally how they could harm the user.

There was also 5 degrees of the severity of a backlash. It was complicated reading, but Ryuuken worked through it with his usual thoroughness.

When he looked up again, it was completely dark in the room and his food had gone cold hours ago. It now looked completely unappetizing.

He turned on the lights and finished his analysis and double checked and triple checked it.

By the looks of it, he was doomed.

The combination of flow points and flow pattern he'd used was one of the more dangerous ones and he had been utterly unable to support the force of it. The backlash he'd experienced was of maximum severity, hitting his vital organs and it wasn't done damaging, it was still at work – meaning he was only going to get worse.

Maximum severity meant death if untreated.

He flicked through the pages to get some idea of the time perspective in the matter, but the book was more vague on this point.

"No no no," he repeated in a low voice, when he found nothing and closed the book.

He ran his hand through his hair again as he drew a shuddering breath and opened the book again. He noted the word "untreated."

A backlash of max severity could be stopped if healed with a specific healing spell called "Wiedergeburt."

Ryuuken had to admit, he'd never heard of it and looked it up. The irony didn't escape him when he realized it was a telekinetic spell and it couldn't be performed by the person itself.

He coughed weakly and leaned back while closing the book with deliberation. He opened the first drawer and produced a cigarette. He put it to his lips and lit it in one smooth movement. He inhaled the smoke deeply before looking at the book again.

He ran his hand through his hair and chuckled bitterly without humour.

The irony of being the true Last Quincy hit him hard.


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Thank you very much for the kind reviews urging me to continue. A special thank you to Shackleton for a heartfelt review that fell on a dry spot. Just the right nudge at the right time This one is for you Shackleton 3

**Withering 20**

The next couple of days went by in a haze for Ryuuken. He spent most of his time isolating himself, staring into nothingness or rereading the Quincy book.

He said nothing, kept his meal times, and took his medication. Mitsumi could do little but watch silently as he transformed into an indifferent zombie. It was unnerving and what was even more unsettling was that he'd started smoking again. His cough seemed a little better despite it though.

When he still was pensive distant on the third day, she called Isshin and informed him of her worries and strange behaviour after reading the book he didn't want to tell her anything about.

Ryuuken drove home from the Kurosaki Clinic, where he'd been assisting Isshin for the last 4 hours. He had also gotten some test results back on himself, checking for infection and the likes.

Isshin had been glad to inform him that he now had a clean bill of health. Ryuuken had played along; acting pleased and engaging in Isshin's following joyous conversation. However, he was not convinced about his health. Granted, he had a bit of colour in his cheeks now and he'd managed to gain a couple of pounds.

However, he was still tired, still coughing, and there was a strange weakness that lurked in his joints and muscles. He was now convinced that he indeed had suffered a massive back lash and it was only a matter of time, before he would become seriously ill.

He sighed. He had always believed that being Quincy was what was going to kill him in the end. He'd just never imagined it to be like this. He really was just insignificantly withering away.

He had been playing with the thought of training Uryuu, but he kept pushing the idea away, well knowing that he would never be able to learn quickly enough for it to make a difference. Uryuu might not even possess the talent for wielding telekinetic spirit particles.

At the same time he still disdained it all.

At the same time he felt a little sad that the entire legacy would die with him. Uryuu could have children and he would teach them this self-taught Quincy techniques that was but a shadow of what it really could be. What it was. It bugged him. And he was annoyed that it bugged him.

He lit a cigarette to calm his nerves a bit. He still concealed his remerging smoking habits from Isshin, but he figured it made no difference, so he indulged himself, but he still didn't want Isshin to pry too much.

Mitsumi had scolded him repeatedly for his smoking, but she was slowly realizing that it made no difference. They were back to rarely speaking to each other. Only the most necessary formalities and pleasantries were uttered between them. He could see that it saddened her and truth be told, it saddened him as well, but it was no use to pull someone closer, if he really was withering away.

If. There was this word again in his head. He supposed it was just human nature to hope for the impossible. When, would be correct.

He spent the rest of the afternoon looking into his Quincy book or staring into the air, smoking too much. He found himself quite restless. He couldn't really resign himself to doing nothing until his time was up. It wasn't in his nature.

He got back out into the car and drove to Uryuu's place, which was a small apartment in a rather unsafe part of Karakura. It was practically slum and it was most social outcasts that lived there. Ryuuken's shiny black broad prestige class car stood out like a sore thumb in the parking lot among old cars that barely cast a shadow.

Uryuu's expression when he opened the door was priceless. It was a mixture of surprise, anger, and regret. It was evident that he regretted deeply having opened the door at all. Ryuuken couldn't help but smirk. It was exactly as he'd expected it to be.

"What are you doing here?" Uryuu finally asked, after having stared dumbstruck at Ryuuken for several seconds. Ryuuken sighed, for once the boy hit home. What the hell was he doing there?

"I suppose I came to offer you authentic Quincy training," Ryuuken began in a voice, far more insecure than Uryuu had ever heard him use.

"By you?" Uryuu asked, squinting a bit. Ryuuken chuckled. He could hear how stupid it sounded.

"Yes," he continued nevertheless, "-I've come to realize that it would be a pity that the title of the Last Quincy belongs to me."

"I am the Last Quincy," Uryuu asserted and folded his arms. Ryuuken suddenly got cold and intense.

"You don't know what Quincy really means," Ryuuken bit him off. Uryuu was just about to protest, when Ryuuken continued, "- What little children's play your grand father taught you do not entitle you to bear the title. It has always been so that you had to receive formal training to call yourself Quincy. What little technique you have stumbled upon yourself doesn't even come close to the real thing."

Uryuu was furious, but restrained himself, "-and you know the real thing? I find this unlikely, since you disowned everything."

"I had good reason to disown it," Ryuuken argued, "-I was in elite training, and leader of a "Viertel" ... a Quincy 4 man battle group, which you wouldn't know anything about. I was..." Ryuuken stopped himself and let out a strained breath, "-it doesn't matter. The offer is real. If you wish to accept, meet me back home tomorrow afternoon."

Ryuuken didn't meet Uryuu's eyes, he just turned away and began making his way down the stairs again.

"Wait," Uryuu protested, "-what is the catch? What strings are attached?"

Ryuuken stopped and faced him again at the next landing. He supposed he had that one coming.

"No strings, no catch," he offered in a low voice and continued out of Uryuu's line of sight. He was barely down the stairway, before he'd lit a cigarette and shaking his head. What the hell was he doing?

"What are the conditions?" was the first thing that came out of Uryuu's mouth when Ryuuken opened the door. Uryuu had come later, much later than Ryuuken had though appropriate. The sun had gone down an hour ago and Ryuuken was already getting tired. He brought the lit cigarette he' been hiding behind the door to his mouth and inhaled deeply to catch the cold reply that threatened to come across his lips. He took his time.

"Are you smoking?" Uryuu asked in belief and arched a brow. Ryuuken met his gaze and exhaled deliberately slow.

"First condition is that you meet on time always," Ryuuken began, ignoring Uryuu's comment completely. Uryuu frowned.

"That's not what I meant," Uryuu objected, "-Who should I not speak to? What will you forbid me?! I need to know."

Ryuuken pursed his lips before inhaling the toxic smoke again. Uryuu rolled his eyes with impatience.

"As I said," Ryuuken began and exhaled, " –there are no strings attached, but I do expect common courtesy."

"Why?" Uryuu spat, "-what has made you change your mind?"

"As I said," Ryuuken repeated and gritted his teeth for a second before succumbing to a coughing that clearly took him by surprise. He cleared his throat forcibly and ended the fit, "-I've realized that it would be a shame that the Quincy legacy should end with me." He coughed again a couple of time behind a closed mouth and cleared his throat again, clearly annoyed. Nevertheless, the next thing he did, was taking a long drag of the cigarette that was nearly burned down.

Uryuu couldn't help but curiously watch the older man fight against himself. He'd never realized that that was what Ryuuken did; fight against himself.

"How's the pneumonia?" he found himself asking.

"Gone," Ryuuken answered and put out the cigarette.

"Why are you still coughing?" Uryuu continued.

"It's going to take a month or two before that settles down," Ryuuken explained hurriedly in a low voice.

"Why the hell are you smoking again?" Uryuu asked dryly, somehow suddenly, sounding a lot like Ryuuken would have. Ryuuken arched a brow and his hand sought out the cigarette case, wanting to produce a new one. He handled social interactions better with a cigarette to focus on. He decided against it though and put his hand in a pocket.

"Second condition is that you don't question my personal choices that have no effect on you," Ryuuken effectively ended it, "-can you live with that?"

Uryuu looked unimpressed, "-sure."

"Good," Ryuuken turned around and gestured Uryuu to follow him, "-we'll go into the gardens."

He coughed softly into his fist and Uryuu noted it still sounded wet. He also noted that even if the older man's pallor looked significantly healthier, he hadn't managed to gain much weight. Even though Ryuuken's shoulders were a little broader and he was a 4 inches taller, he was still only about Uryuu's size, which looked strange for a man of more than 40 years of age.

Ryuuken let him out to the middle of the well kept garden where that was a larger area with grass. The garden itself was surrounded by large trees and the closest neighbours were about a mile away. They would not be detected here, even if their arrows would make quite the light flashes.

Ryuuken sat down on a weathered stone bench in the middle of this area and produced a cigarette again.

"Shoot an arrow," Ryuuken bid and lit the cigarette without looking at Uryuu.

"What? Where?" Uryuu asked in confusion.

"Doesn't matter – just down the garden. It doesn't have to be powerful," Ryuuken explained and brought the cigarette to his lips.

Uryuu didn't look he quite understood, but took his stance, keeping his back very straight and allowed the spirit particles to flow through his body and released the energy forward through his wrist. He looked after the flash of light for a second then turned to Ryuuken, whom didn't even look at him.

"Are you paying attention?" Uryuu asked. Ryuuken furrowed his brow, but didn't meet his gaze.

"I'm not looking at you," he explained, "-I'm analyzing the spirit flow. Again."

Uryuu tensed his jaws for a second, but then fired another arrow.

"Again," came Ryuuken's biding voice.

He fired another, exactly like the first two.

"Again," Ryuuken repeated.

Uryuu felt his patience slip away already. However, the fired a fourth arrow after sighing audibly.

Ryuuken stood up and moved closer to Uryuu than he felt comfortable with. He had to stop himself taking a step backwards.

"You have obtained some bad habits over the years," Ryuuken only commented, "-again."

Uryuu resumed his stance, glad to take the focus of the proximity of the other Quincy. He was just about to gather the spirit particles, when he felt a hand on his chest. He instantly lost all concentration and jumped back.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asked accusingly scowled at Ryuuken.

"What? Did your grandfather never ... it's a known Quincy teaching technique," Ryuuken tried to explained. Uryuu looking suspiciously at him, but in the back of his head he remembered his grandfather's reassuring hand on his chest when they sometimes practised something.

"You do remember?" Ryuuken asked, "-he never told you why he did that?"

Uryuu didn't much less suspicious and only nodded. Ryuuken sighed and took a deep drag of the cigarette.

"When one Quincy put a palm on another Quincy's chest, it allows the first one to feel the flow of spirit particles in the second individual," Ryuuken explained.

To Uryuu this seemed farfetched and the only thing that rushed through his mind was why Ryuuken suddenly wanted to touch him. Still, the feeling from his childhood roamed around, making his more inclined to believe Ryuuken.

"Is that the only thing you'd be able to feel?" Uryuu asked. Ryuuken inhaled from the cigarette and coughed a couple of times.

"Sometimes the first would be able to detect strong feelings in the second," Ryuuken explained, "-but it's nothing like mind reading if that's what you mean."

"Do you have to do it?" Uryuu asked insecurely. Ryuuken wanted to roll his eyes, but resisted.

"If you wish, you may test it on me first," Ryuuken offered.

Uryuu was dumbstruck. He was both terrified and curious.

"H-how...?" Uryuu began.

"Just placed your palm on my chest, while I gather and release an arrow," Ryuuken explained again with more patience than he'd ever thought himself capable of.

"O-ok," Uryuu agreed and took a tentative step forward. Ryuuken remembered for a second how much pain he'd been in the last time he'd manipulated, but pushed it back. He placed the cigarette between his lips and positioned himself beside Uryuu without looking at him. He placed himself in a similar stance as Uryuu had and pointed his right arm and hand towards the back of the garden, leaving his left side open for Uryuu.

"You ready?" he asked slightly muffled, the cigarette dancing between his lips. He still looked at where he was aiming and not at Uryuu.

This made Uryuu feel less foolish and he nodded. He hesitantly placed his palm squarely on Ryuuken's chest and felt nothing but bone underneath, but before he could think any further, he felt Ryuuken tense up.

What followed was nothing like Uryuu had imagined; Ryuuken gathered Spirit particles like his entire being imploded and he didn't simply release the energy – he sent it on its way like his core exploded. All the force of it went through Ryuukens chest and it was so violent that it sent Uryuu flying backwards.

Sprawling on the ground, his ears rang and he started coughing heavily. His lungs burned unexplainably and he continued to cough.

Ryuuken looked at him with a concerned expression, before placing his own on his chest. _Was he really feeling as bad as that_? Ryuuken shook his head and argued to himself that the boy only had the wind knocked out of him.

"I thought you said you were ready?" Ryuuken commented dryly and took a drag of the cigarette before placing it between his fingers again. Uryuu scrambled to his feet as he got the coughing under control and the burning sensation in his lungs dissipated.

"What the hell was that?" Uryuu asked and straightened his clothes.

"I shot an arrow," Ryuuken began, "-what did you think it was?"

"Shoot one now," Uryuu commanded, "-shoot."

Ryuuken took a long drag of the cigarette and fired another arrow, exactly like he'd done before. Uryuu stared in bewilderment. From the outside, it looked like any other arrow, but something totally off the scales was going on inside Ryuuken.

"How is that possible?" he breathed.

"You have no technique," Ryuuken concluded, "-you have not been taught correctly. Do you begin to understand why you are not yet worthy of the last Quincy title."

Even though that last sentence rubbed him the wrong way, he noted Ryuuken has said 'yet'. Though he didn't want to acknowledge it, Ryuuken definitely had a different control of spirit particles than he ever imagined possible.

"I think so," Uryuu admitted, "-what the hell did you do?"

"We'll talk about that later," Ryuuken rejected, "-now it's your turn."

Uryuu tensed immediately – he'd completely forgotten he would have to return the favour.

He decided to act it like Ryuuken had and didn't look at him, only made himself ready and allowed Ryuuken in before he shot the arrow. The sensation of the warm hand resting on his chest was still as uncomfortable as it'd been earlier.

The cigarette was still resting between Ryuuken's finger, slowly fuming, making Uryuu cough again. Ryuuken seemed to wake up at this and shot a glance at the cigarette before taking a couple of steps backwards.

"Sorry," he mumbled and took a last drag of it before putting it out. Uryuu didn't know what to do about an apology from his father and just waved a dismissive hand at him.

"So, what did you detect?" he asked, changing the subject.

"That we need to start with the basics," Ryuuken revealed and Uryuu felt his heart drop, "-but it is as expected."

"So everything grandfather taught me was rubbish?" Uryuu asked.

"No, not everything," Ryuuken sighed and missed a cigarette again, "-you have to understand that my father wasn't very talented within the Quincy arts. My mother, however, was quite the wonder child."

They continued analyzing spirit flows into the wee hours of the night, mostly just awaking Uryuu to what the possibilities was and what they would start working on. Uryuu agreed to come the following afternoon again.

Until Ryuuken had classes at the university they would train every evening, after that they would have to cut it down to 4 times a week.


End file.
